


A Study in Stripes: Aromantic Awareness Week 2021

by TheBrcklayer



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Accidental and otherwise, Adrien Agreste Is Sunshine, Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir & Chloé Bourgeois Friendship, Alix and Chloé Friendship, Alix is filthy rich yo, Aromantic Alix Kubdel, Aromantic Awareness Week, Aromantic Character, Aromantic Chloé Bourgeois, Autistic Adrien Agreste, Bee Chloé Bourgeois | Queen Bee, Bisexual Marinette Dupain-Cheng, Chloe begins to work stuff out, Chloe has a filthy mouth, Chloé Bourgeois Being Chloé Bourgeois, Chloé Bourgeois Character Study, Chloé Bourgeois Needs a Hug, Chloé Bourgeois Redemption, Female Friendship, Gen, Miraculous Holder Chloé Bourgeois, Nebularomantic Adrien Agreste, Original Akumas, POV Chloé Bourgeois, Post-Episode: s02 Queen Wasp (Queen's Battle Part 2), Self-Loathing Chloé Bourgeois, So many people forget, and put her act together, arophobia, depressed main character, no betas we die like men, rated for langauge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-15
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-03-18 14:53:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 24,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29370342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheBrcklayer/pseuds/TheBrcklayer
Summary: Chloe continued to read, fighting back another sob. “...I’m… I’m not broken?”Something bubbled up inside her. A sense of community. Something she honestly couldn’t say she’d felt in such a long time.-------In which Chloe is forced to re-examine herself, work out who she is and what her place is in the world. ...and maybe, just maybe get herself off this self-destructive path and maybe even be a hero? Well, she'll certainly try at any rate!
Comments: 11
Kudos: 47





	1. Day 1: The Aro Journey

**Author's Note:**

> Don't own, don't make money off Miraculous Ladybug. Don't even pretend to.

“But don’t you get it Adri-kins? We could have it _all._ Like, I’ve got the looks, you’ve got the looks, and we both have _utterly_ winning personalities. Like who wouldn’t want moi?” Chloe babbled, preening herself as she did her nails. “Honestly, it’s a no brainer! Like, I’m a prize right?”

Dupain-Cheng was giving her a funny look, which Chloe ignored. Honestly, jealousy was not a good look for the girl. Yes, sure, it was natural to want what one could never have but it utterly ruined her admittedly pretty face. 

While Chloe herself wasn’t gay, she wasn’t blind either. Dupain-Cheng wasn’t the most beautiful girl in the world but she really wasn’t terribly _ugly_ either. Honestly, she was pretty in her own way, fairly petite. Now obviously, her looks simply weren’t good enough to attract _Adrien_ but surely there was someone out there who would take her? Maybe Tsurugi? Goodness knows that girl sooooo set off her gaydar so badly it wasn’t even funny.

For Christ’s sake, the only time Chloe had ever seen Tsurugi even _smile_ was around Dupain-Cheng. It was an awkward ghost of a smile at first, yeah, but points for effort! She was getting better at it anyways. _Besides_ they had plenty in common, right? Both former superheroines right? She was sure there was plenty else but whatever. Dupain-Cheng would never be good enough for Adrien. 

“I’m sorry Chlo, but…” Adrien started.

“...you just don’t like me that way?” Chloe asked, having heard this before. “But… but what do I have to do to _make_ you like me like that? I’m your best friend, we’ve been ‘like this’ since we were little tots! It’s only _just_ the next logical step in our relationship right?”

“Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t,” Adrien shrugged even as they made their way to class. “I just dunno.”

“Well, make up your mind quickly, Adri-Kins,” Chloe said with a little smile. “I can’t promise that I’ll be waiting _forever_ you know... A girl can only give you so many chances you know, right?”

With that, she left him in her wake with heels clacking against the floor. With a sigh, she conceded today’s defeat. Another failed attempt. Oh well, maybe tomorrow would bear fruit! All she could do was hope right? Time and time again, she’d heard how much of a perfect match she and Adrien were from her daddy, and he was _always_ right. A boy and a girl simply couldn’t be _just_ friends, that was how things always worked! 

A prince always came to sweep a princess off their feet, and Chloe was nothing but a fairy tale Princess in waiting! Her daddy had always said so! (Her mother on the other hand, well… but that was neither here nor there, what did she know? She clearly never cared enough to actually be here when it mattered!)

Sure, Adrien was a bit of a weeb, goodness knows she’d caught him singing songs from some _anime_ constantly. Currently he’d been stuck on My Hero Academia, and if she _heard_ Higher Ground one more time this week she swore she was going to jump out a window. The pain would be worth it. But putting aside her Prince’s dorkiness, he was utterly perfect otherwise. He had the looks, the patient personality, he even had his own personal castle in his mansion! (But it was mostly the looks! Oooh, that sun-kissed blond hair did _things_ to Chloe she feared describing!)

“Are you sure that’s love you’re describing?” came a voice from behind her, and she whirled around to see Kubdel sitting in her usual spot on the stairs. “It, eh, yeah it honestly sounds more like a _need_ if you ask me.”  
  
“Kubdel,” Chloe said in a tone of forced politeness. “...why do you even care? Don’t you have something better to do, like get involved in some stupid dare? I’ve always thought you didn’t care about love. That you thought it was ‘icky’ for whatever reason?”  
  
“Such smooth flowing poetry,” Kubdel deadpanned. “Such patient understanding!” 

“...is there a point to all of this,” Chloe rolled her eyes. “Or are you going to just sit there snarking about things you don’t even care for?”  
  
“Meh, I don’t even see _why_ I bothered with you,” Kubdel muttered. “Maybe it’s my bleeding heart getting the better of me again. The world’s bigger than your own ego and if you pulled your own head out of the sand maybe you’d begin to understand. But I’m not honestly surprised you’re so blind Bourgeois, because you already think you know everything.”  
  
“Only the things that matter,” Chloe replied. “Now go away, go on shoo! I can’t be seen talking to the street rat, at least until she gets better clothes. Honestly Kubdel, your father is the museum director of the Louvre, you could at least pretend to care about your social status.”  
  
“Meh,” Kubdel replied. “You’re asking me to conform to society’s expectations. No thank you. Anyways, Chloe, maybe you should start asking what you _really_ want. Do you want Adrien as a person, or Adrien as a status symbol.”  
  
“You’re starting to sound like Dupain-Cheng,” Chloe grit her teeth.

“Just sayin’, when it comes to Adrien, Marinette’s usually right,” Kubdel shrugged. “I know how much it pains you to hear this, but maybe you should listen to her every once in a while.”  
  
“Listen to Dupain-Cheng?” Chloe gaped, looking at Kubdel as if she’d suddenly grown a second head. “Surely you’re joking! You’ve finally gone round the bend, Kubdel, right? Is that it?”

“Just offering some friendly advice, wasn’t expecting you to _actually take it_ but eh, worth a shot right?” Kubdel shrugged again. “I’ve kinda got you pegged, Chloe.”  
  
“Didn’t realize we were on a first name basis _Kubdel._ And you have me pegged?” Chloe asked. “What’s that supposed to mean? Is like that a sex thing?”

“I mean I’ve got you worked out,” Kubdel replied, still cryptic. “Don’t worry, you’ll work it out for yourself some day. At least I hope you do, it’s very liberating honestly!”

And as she walked off, Chloe was left wondering _just_ what she meant. It nagged at her all day, pricking away at the back of her mind. That night however, she woke up in a start. She needs to hear someone’s voice.

Her eyes felt heavy, her brain prodding her to go back to sleep, despite the tears she fought back. She ripped the phone out of it’s charger, she… she just needed to hear someone’s voice. Sabrina would understand, she had to. This nightmare… it wasn’t like the rest. It was different. Usually it was her mother’s voice that haunted her dreams. Not… not this time.

A wave of humiliation rushed over her again. Maybe she should just get back to sleep, it wasn’t worth bothering anyone over. Besides, Sabrina was probably fast asleep, dreaming peacefully and not having to worry about… about… well, about things. Honestly, it was two in the morning and she had only a few hours before the dawn broke. She should just get back to sleep, maybe it wouldn’t return.

God, if Sandboy was here, he’d have prime material to torment her with. Honestly, she doesn’t know why she’s trying to have someone pick up and just listen to her. Her heart was still racing though. ...honestly, she doubted she’d get back to sleep tonight. Maybe a cold glass of milk would… no, she wasn’t a child. And Jean wasn’t awake at this time of night so she couldn’t call for him anyways. Hugging her plush bear close, hot tears stained her face. God, she’d need so much make up come morning!

Another little sob came, and finally after that a voice. She hears it on the other end, slurred, and tinged with worry but to her horror still recognizable. She’d know that voice anywhere, she heard it every day.

“...whuz… whuz wrong now?” Dupain-Cheng asked. “Chloe, izzat you?”  
  
Why did she even _have_ that number still in her contacts? Had she forgotten to delete it after Despair Bear? Fuck! 

“...just go back to bed Dupain-Cheng,” Chloe said into the phone, trying to ignore the rising humiliation. “Please, this doesn’t involve you. I’m sure you don’t want to wake up too late, and miss your first class of the day again…”

“No… no, you called me,” Dupain-Cheng said back through the telephone, and Chloe could hear the weariness giving way to more worry. “...Chloe, have you been crying? Your voice… it sounds like…”

Damn her kindness! She liked to shine like the sun, and Chloe honestly hated it. Everyone loved her, while poor Chloe Bourgeois? She was left to be treated with nothing short of disgust.

“It… it was a mistake, just a misdial. Go back to bed, Dupain-Cheng,” Chloe fired back, her voice still sounding way too hollow to be believable. “...just get some sleep okay? Pretend I didn’t call you.”  
  
“Well, obviously I can’t now,” Dupain-Cheng returned, polite as ever. 

“...damn it Dupain-Cheng, can’t you just take a hint and…” Chloe was suddenly reminded of her dream.

 _“Take a hint Chlo, I’ll never love you!”_ _  
_ _  
_ “...I’m sorry Adrien, maybe you’re right.”  
  
Too late she’d realized she’d spoken aloud. 

“Adrien?” Dupain-Cheng mused. “...look, I don’t pretend to understand what’s going on, but maybe you can tell me about it? Tell me about what’s bothering you, I’ll try and listen and maybe we can both fall back to sleep and-”  
  
“-forget that this ever happened come the morning?” Chloe replied. “Yeah, yeah… I think I’d like that. God, this is so humiliating. It’s ridiculous, utterly ridiculous isn’t it? Me crying to you about a _nightmare_. Christ, you probably think I’m such a little kid.”

“I’ve had nightmares before Chloe, it’s nothing to be ashamed of,” Dupain-Cheng replied. “I won’t laugh at you, I promise.

Chloe, at any other occasion would have just hung up. But she knew Dupain-Cheng wasn’t lying. The girl was as pure as the new fallen snow. She didn’t have a mean bone in her entire body. And honestly? Chloe sorta envied her. It was so _so_ hard to be, ugh, nice and yet she made it look easy. While all she, Queen Bee, got was scorn. 

“P-Promise?” Chloe’s voice wavered.

“You know me, Chloe. Of course it’s a promise…” 

Maybe she should hang up, this was so humiliating to talk about. And yet she knew she was too frightened to go back to sleep, at least without help. Her mind would begin to wander, anxiety would begin to set in as she had nothing but her own breathing to keep her company. Fine, screw it.

And the words soon found themselves easily slipping from her mouth. It was easy, actually. Speaking of that dreadful nightmare, and all the while Dupain-Cheng listened. Occasionally, she cries some more as she thinks of Adrien’s voice, dripping with nothing but pure scorn and hatred for her. 

Was… was she really that entitled? She… she loved him right? Did Adrien really think of her that way? Was he just waiting to surprise her with a secret disgust for his childhood friend? She’d sunk to the floor in her dream, the class retreating away from her as Queen Bee found herself without a hive. 

At one point, Dupain-Cheng told her to take a deep breath, count to five. She reminded her of Adrien, what he was really like. How his smile shone like the sun, his green eyes like emeralds. If there was anyone purer than Dupain-Cheng, it was him. He’d never leave her, not really. 

But all the same, again Chloe wondered. Was she really showing him the love he deserved? ...the more she thought about it, the more she had to wonder. Was she… was she like Rossi? Just shoving herself onto him like a cheap whore? To… to think about it, she honestly wondered if she was setting herself up for another nightmare. God, she was such a wreck. 

Finally, Mari.. No, Dupain-Cheng works up the courage to speak. The clock now showed a quarter to three. Had they really been talking for that long? 

“Why do you love Adrien?” she asked, pointedly but curtidly. And to her surprise, Chloe struggles for an answer.

“Well, why do you love him? He’s… oh, how do I explain it?” she ponders in thought. “He’s… oh, he’s… gah, this is difficult. He’s.. just so… so... you know?”

“Mhmm, I see,” Dupain-Cheng yawned tiredy, Chloe’s eyes narrowing. As if sleep was more important than Adrien Agreste! “...I see, you know I do have a question.”

“Shoot,” Chloe replied before she had a chance to stop herself. 

Her rival’s answer was actually surprising, and rather stupid. “...are you sure it's Adrien you love?”

“Don’t be stupid, Dupain-Cheng,” Chloe nearly shrieked. “Of course I love him. He’s _Adrien._ Do I need a reason?”  
  
“Yes, he is rather perfect isn’t he?” Dupain-Cheng still sounded strangely suspicious. “Alright, I was just asking.” 

“Isn’t everyone supposed to fall in love?” Chloe replied, fighting back a yawn. “...isn’t that how the world works?”  
  
“Yes, you’d think that wouldn’t you?” Dupain-Cheng replied. 

“What’s _that_ supposed to mean?” Chloe returned. “You’re starting to sound like Kubdel.”  
  
“I’ll take that as a compliment,” Dupain-Cheng replied. “Alix is a great friend after all. But you say you love Adrien right, as in from the bottom of your heart?”

Chloe rolled her eyes at her rival’s stupidity, of course she did. What the hell kind of question was that supposed to be? The heart wanted what the heart wanted! That was the way the world worked, or… the way it was supposed to work anyways. So _why_ did she feel… no, she felt something! She had to, right? Her breath caught in her throat, rather fearfully.  
  
“...what’s wrong with me?” she wants to wonder, and does so. “I love Adrien. Of course I do. I just do, don’t question me Dupain-Cheng. I mean, I'm supposed to love him... right?”

“...get some sleep Chloe, okay?” her rival requested. “It’s… yeah, it’s way too early in the morning for this.”  
  
“Don’t you dare hang up on me, Dupain-Cheng!” Chloe nearly snarled. “I still demand answers. What’s wrong with me?”  
  
“Absolutely nothing,” Dupain-Cheng replied, before yawning again. “Now really, we must get some sleep.”  
  
Chloe wants to argue, but the yawn rising up from her throat shuts that down. Her eyelids were heavy, and the room was threatening to become darker than ever. Yeah… yeah, sleep seemed to be a good idea. 

Before she could stop herself, she whispered: “..thanks, I guess....” even as the realm of dreams claimed her once more.

Her sleep was surprisingly peaceful, no more nightmares. But when she awoke to the bright of day, Dupain-Cheng’s earlier words still nagged at her. Debating picking up the phone, and calling her again she let out a groan barely able to drag herself out of bed. Nothing… nothing was wrong with her, apparently, at least if she believed her rival. 

_“But what’s with being so vague, I understand she was tired but she could have at least given me a hint! ...am I gay? Was I projecting? Did I believe I had to love Adrien, to conform to society’s expectations? Is that it?”_

She couldn’t have been in love with Dupain-Cheng could she? ...like, was pulling her pigtails supposed to be hiding deep secret crush-like feelings for the girl? Just… what? Okay, ewww no. Maybe the girl wasn’t completely horrible, but just no. Questioning that just led to a whole load of heavy things Chloe wasn’t entirely sure she was ready to unpack yet. Or ever.

 _“...why me?”_ Chloe continued to ponder as she dressed herself. _“I mean, I love Adrien? Don’t I?”_ _  
_ _  
_ She sat in silence, obviously expecting an answer. And of course, none came.

\-------

Chloe had never been so grateful for school honestly, just… anything to keep her mind off her earlier dilemma. Mind… easier said than done apparently. The whole school was awash with pink and red and love was in the air. Now that she thought about it, everyone had seemed that little bit mushier lately.

Of course, how could she have forgotten. Valentine’s Day was coming up. ...and honestly, not for the first time she felt just that little bit sick to her stomach. Honestly, it was a day to celebrate being in love, having someone to hold. And not for the first time, she was spending it single. 

Okay, honestly, anything to take her mind off of this churning feeling in her gut. Maybe she should go after Lê Chiến again. Turn him into Dark Cupid for the second time, maybe then she’d at least have a _distraction_ from this madness. Someone’s face to smash in. She felt it often worked wonders.

...hmm, maybe that gym membership she’d turned down a while back was looking awfully tempting now. Just _something_ to do while this week passed her on by. Oh well, in a few days there’d be plenty of cheap chocolate on sale. Yummy! Wouldn’t that be nice?

“...this is ridiculous, utterly ridiculous,” she uttered to herself. “I mean, what’s the point? Most of these relationships won’t last a year, hell some won’t even last a few weeks. So what’s the point in celebrating them?”

“Have you no room in your heart for love?” a familiar, yet unwelcome girlish voice asked in a shrill tone. “Really, Chloe! It’s about the _feeling_ you get!”  
  
“Shut up, Lavillant,” Chloe muttered trying to ignore the next churn in her gut. “...Feelings or no feelings, I’d prefer a relationship that lasts forever. Not one that fizzles and dies like a brush fire. I’d prefer the inferno.”

And yet, part of that sounded hollow to her ears. Chloe really wasn’t sure why. It also hadn’t escaped her notice that she hadn’t said ‘loving relationship.’ Just a relationship, no caveats.

“It’s okay Chloe,” Lavillant squeaked out. “I’m sure you’ll find someone!”

_“...yeah, sure…”_

And this time, the image of blond hair didn’t even appear in her mind’s eye. She wondered why that was.

“...alright Dupain-Cheng,” she approached her rival after class finally let out, Chloe sending a thank you to whatever deity was listening. It was next to impossible to pay attention to Ms. Bustier today. “...you got me, something… something’s wrong with me right? Go on, don’t lie to me!”

“No, nothing’s wrong with you,” Dupain-Cheng said kindly. “...after I woke up, first thing I did was do a bit of searching. At first I thought you were gay, and there’s nothing wrong with that so don’t start. Last thing I need is you internalizing your feelings and masking them with false homophobia.”  
  
“I wasn’t going to-” Chloe started but a finger was placed to her lips.

“Maybe, maybe not. It doesn’t really matter,” Dupain-Cheng went on, shoving her phone in front of her. “Just… just read okay?”

Was… was that a pride flag? Didn’t look like any she’d ever seen, with green turning to white and then to black. Something called out to her, Chloe wasn’t sure what but she kept reading.  
  
“What is an Aromantic?” she read, testing the words and continuing to read. The webpage address lay above her in the search bar. _https://arospecawarenessweek.tumblr.com/askus_. Interesting. “...An aromantic is someone who doesn’t experience romantic attraction.”

...could that be it? But no romantic attraction… that was impossible right? Everyone felt _something_ right? Everyone except… A shriek escaped her.

“Are you saying I’m a SOCIOPATH?” 

“...well, no…” Dupain-Cheng muttered, looking like she was biting back some snarky remark. “Keep reading, but… but no I’m not saying that. There’s different _kinds_ of affection, remember? You love your daddy right?”  
  
“Yeah, of course!” Chloe almost snapped, before taking a deep breath to calm herself. “Of course I do.”  
  
“That’s _familiar_ affection,” Dupain-Cheng explained, patient as ever. Honestly, Chloe mused, if the roles were reversed she doubted she would have been the same. That was… actually kinda sad now that she thought about it. “Similarly, there’s platonic affection, like you caring for Sabrina. Well, I assume you care. It’s hard to tell with you at times.”

Chloe was nice enough to ignore that, even as Dupain-Cheng gestured to keep reading. “Am I arospec or am I just broken, or just overthinking?”  
  
She nearly dropped her phone in shock, surprised by how much sense the answer actually made. Tears threatened to break, hot and salty as she continued to read. The page… it was kind and reassuring. Patient and understanding. 

“The fact that you're asking this suggests that you're probably arospec, and not just overthinking--and DEFINITELY not broken!” Chloe continued to read, fighting back another sob. “...I’m… I’m not broken?”  
  
_Something_ bubbled up inside her, something she couldn’t place at first. She wasn’t sure what it was at first, but soon the blond was able to put a name to the feeling. It was a sense of… belonging? A sense of community. Something she honestly couldn’t say she’d felt in such a long time. ...not since she met Sabrina, who accepted her as she was, issues and all. ...Chloe wondered if that would still be the case.

Oh well, at least Dupain-Cheng -of all people!- seemed not to really care who she was. There was some bitter irony for you. One of her only allies was the girl she’d bullied for years! Okay, now she knew she _was_ crying.

She felt a pair of strong arms wrap around her from behind, and her eyes widened in surprise. “...Dupain-Cheng?”  
  
“You looked like you needed a hug,” the half-Chinese girl whispered. “...it’s okay Chloe, you’re not alone.”

“...they wouldn’t understand,” Chloe whispered, her whole body shaking as she sobbed. “...Francois Dupont. You’ve seen the halls right? All pink and red and oh it’s so utterly…”  
  
“Ridiculous?” Dup… Marinete offered, and Chloe fought back an ugly wet laugh.

“Yeah, that,” the blonde admitted. “...Christ, how do I explain this to Ms. Bustier? Fuck! You know what she’s like.”  
  
“I can help,” Marinette offered. “She’s not an arophobe. At least… not an intentional one. Honestly, you’d be surprised about how many of us understand. Half of the class, we’re still working out who we are. Alix? She’s Aromantic.”  
  
“...well, suddenly I feel like an idiot,” Chloe muttered. “Yeah… that makes a lot of sense. ...damn it.”

“It’s okay, you didn’t know,” Marinette soothed. “Sabrina, I’m sure she’d understand as well. If she’s truly your best friend? She’d support you in everything.”  
  
“You think so?” Chloe asked, dabbing at her eyes and hoping nobody had heard her crying.

“I know so,” Marinette said kindly. “You don’t have to come out right now, you can do it when you’re ready. It’s okay, I can wait. I’ll be by your side, you know.”  
  
“You… you would? Really?” Chloe asked. “But I’ve bullied you for years! And… and all over some guy, half of the time these past two years!”  
  
“I’ve done some pretty stupid things as well,” Marinette admitted. “...you should see my shrine to Adrien. Ugh, yeah that’s going to go. Point is, well, we’re both pretty guilty. Honestly, I should have tried to bury this hatchet long ago.”  
  
“...not like I would have accepted your peace offering, Dupa… Sorry, Marinette,” Chloe went on. “...what have we even been fighting over? You know, I’ve honestly forgotten.”  
  
“...same actually, now that I think of it. Maybe we’ve just been fighting for the sake of fighting by this point. We’ve hated each other for so long, we never stopped to ask _why_ ,” Marinette admitted. “...and honestly, I can’t think up an answer for why that is.”  
  
“Me either…” Chloe admitted in turn. “Maybe it’s time to move on with our lives. I don’t want to fight anymore. ...it’s gotten us nowhere, and right now? I just can’t find it within myself to hate you. Not after today.”

“Me either,” Marinette said as she held her new friend -wow that was weird to say- tight. “Friends?”  
  
And Chloe beamed, a great weight finally lifted off her shoulders. “Friends!” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (The midnight chat was [inspired by this story. ](https://archiveofourown.org/works/10381905) For the record, I don't like taking inspiration, at least not heavily from other stories if I can help it. But I needed a good way to get Marinette and Chloe talking. So, alas I had to borrow an idea.)
> 
> Okay, yeah, Chloe *seriously* sets of my Aromantic Radar. Like, uh, with Adrien and her *need* for him I do wonder.  
> It's like she's not attracted to the person, but to an ideal. Okay, yeah you can argue this is the same on Marinette's end but with Chloe? I dunno, I don't think there's any real *romantic* attraction there.
> 
> For the record, I don't *like* writing Chloe. At least not as she is in canon. (Making her grow up in fanfic is another matter)
> 
> I could see the argument about her becoming a better person. Hell, for a while I believed it was possible. But turns out? Giving power to a spoiled brat just validates things for them.


	2. Day 2: Coming Out

The first person Chloe came out to was, of course, Sabrina. It was… admittedly kinda scary. Okay, yeah, it was  _ hugely  _ scary. There was a great weight pressing down on her chest, and a worried churn in her stomach that made her want to back out now, be sick on the floor. At several moments, she almost  _ did  _ turn and run. But she sucked in a breath, took a calming moment to count to ten and steeled herself. She planted her feet to the ground, and didn’t turn and run.

The words managed to slip past her lips easier than she honestly thought they would. There was a crushing silence, oppressing and Chloe again wanted to turn and run. Maybe Sabrina didn’t understand, maybe she hated her.

Then came the tight crushing hug, Sabrina holding her close saying: “I’m glad you came out to me. It’s okay Chloe.”   
  
“You don’t hate me…?” Chloe asked, eyes watery. 

“Hate you?” Sabrina said, still hugging her. “I could never hate you. You’re my best friend, Chloe! I can’t turn my back on you now.”   
  
That set off the waterworks. Chloe knew she didn’t deserve her, by all rights Sabrina really should have found a better friend long ago. She’d often been treated as little better than a slave. Why her eyes hadn’t been opened sooner was beyond he… no, Chloe knew exactly why only now she was beginning to work out that she was a terrible friend.

Marinette, as ever, was the source of her woes.

Not that Chloe was complaining this time, given… well, Dupa... sorry, Marinette, that was taking some getting used to. Marinette was really an example to strive towards. A few years ago, Chloe would have rather gouged out her own eyes than admit to that, but she’d seen how her and Alya’s friendship worked. It was less slavery and more a mutually benefical relationship. The right amount of give and take, instead of just take.

And oh she’d done plenty of that. Sabrina… Chloe knew she’d often taken chances for the redhead to make real friends. Nobody wanted to associate themselves with Bourgeois’ right hand bitch. And if their ‘friendship’ had ever dissolved, well… nobody would be there to pick up the pieces. It was basically entrapment, now that Chloe thought about it with a sickened expression.

“...Chloe, you alright?” Sabrina asked with a concerned look, adjusting her glasses. 

“No, I’m not,” the blonde admitted. “...you should have dumped me as a friend long ago, you don’t need to try and defend me.”   
  
“But-”   
  
Chloe held up her hand. “But nothing Sabrina, I’ve been a terrible friend. ...Marinette helped me realize that. Like I’ve been watching her and Ce… Alya. Their relationship… god, it’s so much healthier than ours.”   
  
“...I admit,” Sabrina finally worked up the nerve. “...I admit we’ve never probably had the healthiest of relationships. Remember Vanisher?”   
  
Chloe nodded weakly, bracing herself for whatever came. How could she even forget?   
  
“You… yeah, you treating me like that, what led up to the akumatization? It hurt,” Sabrina had now taken her glasses off to dab at her eyes. “...sometimes I did wonder why I didn’t speak up earlier, but… but I think I know now.”   
  
Chloe’s breath caught in her throat, not really sure if she was ready for that but she knew she had to hear it anyways.

“I was… afraid,” Sabrina admittied, crying a little now as well but managing to mostly keep her composure. “I knew if our friendship ended, nobody would exactly be chomping at the bit to become my new friend. Y-You know?”   
  
“Y-Yeah, I kinda figured that out…” Chloe admitted.

“...honestly, I don’t know where we can go from here,” Sabrina admitted. “I… I need time to work that out, okay?”   


“I… I understand,” Chloe said. “...and if you decide we shouldn't be friends anymore? Honestly, I wouldn’t blame you in the slightest. I don’t deserve you.”

Sabrina gave a sad little smile, and despite the potential for their friendship to be dissolved? Chloe honestly felt strangely relieved. Like her soul felt that much lighter. 

All had been laid out in the open, and for that she was pretty thankful. 

The second person she came out to was Adrien, who never thought ill of her. Of course he didn’t. The boy was literally sunshine, like he didn’t seem to hate  _ anyone _ . (Well, except Rossi but she was a special case.)

“I’m proud of you Chlo,” Adrien said, syrupy sweet. “...it couldn’t have been easy admitting this to me. Coming out to me. I’m glad you trust me this much.”   
  
“Of course I trust you,” Chloe replied. “You’re… well,  _ you _ . You’re my childhood friend! We’ve known each other since we were little tots. If I can’t trust you, who can I trust?”

“I’m glad you stepped up to the plate though,” Adrien replied. “It couldn’t have been… well, as I said, easy saying this to me.”   
  
“...yeah, well, it was even harder saying it to Sabrina,” Chloe laughed nervously. “...she, I was worried she’d hate me. You know how she is with romance. She’s almost as bad as Lavillant. Remember when she brought an entire tub of heart-shaped chocolates to class?”   
  
“On your request.”   
  
“Yeah, well,” Chloe replied, trying not to wince in reminder of just how badly she’d treated her supposed best friend. “I just said to bring chocolates, remember? To treat the class. Okay,  _ yeah  _ it was to get me re-elected as Class Representative but all the same!”   
  
“...are you alright Chlo?” Adrien asked kindly of her. “...you seem kinda down.”

“Yeah, it’s… actually, it’s about me and Sabrina, we talked and we… uh…” Chloe sucked in a breath. “We’re kinda taking a break.”   
  
“...oh,” Adrien said softly in realization about what must have happened. “I’m sorry. I know she meant a lot to you.”   
  
“Not as much as she should have, really,” his fellow blond admitted with a sad sigh. “If I really valued her friendship, I wouldn’t have treated her like crap. I’m… I’m a horrible person, Adrien, and you don’t need to step up and defend me. I’ve long since realized I’ve got too much of my mom in me.”   
  
“No Chlo, you’re better than her,” Adrien continued to say kindly, no disappointment in his voice. “You’re better than her. Your mother… she’d never change. Not in a million years. You’re working to better yourself, that’s what makes you different from her.”   
  
“Yeah, well, if that’s true?” Chloe laughed bitterly. “It’s a little like too little, way too late. I screwed the pooch. Honestly, I’m amazed Marinette put up with me long enough to even spell out I’m Aro. If I was her, I’d just forget about me and move on with my life.”   
  
“But she didn’t,” Adrien replied in turn. “That’s the important bit, she never really hated you know.”   
  
“Yeah, well, sure, funny way of showing it,” Chloe laughed, more bitterness in her tone. “She sure fooled me.”   
  
“I’ve heard her and Alya talk,” Adrien went on.   
  
“Oh, so you eavesdropped,” Chloe laughed. “I didn’t even know you had it in you!”   


“It was never eavesdropping,” Adrien said quickly, blushing as red as Ladybug’s suit. “It was just… accidental overhearing!”   
  
“Eavesdropping!” Chloe coughed out.

“...anyways, point being,” Adrien went on, still blushing red from ear to ear. “I’ve heard the two talk. From what I’ve been able to work out, Marinette she… she’s always been more interested in getting to know you. Work you out, y’know?”   
  
Chloe nodded. “I… suppose that’s right?”

“You’re a good person, Chloe, you just needed time to figure it out.”

Now if only she could actually believe that. Despite all of Adrien’s reassurances, not once did Chloe honestly believe her. She’d been  _ horrible,  _ and honestly currently held the record for most Akumatizations. Including that of her supposed best friend.

Hell… Chloe honestly wouldn’t be surprised if Hawk Moth kept  _ tabs  _ on her, especially with her track record. He probably had a butterfly or two watching her at all times, trailing her just to make sure. ...and to fly to whoever she’d wronged next. 

She’d never felt so sick with herself, basically aiding and abetting a magical terrorist. She bet her daddy was so proud of her… Oh god, her daddy? Would he understand? So far, she’d gotten lucky. But… her daddy, he was different. Old fashioned, given he grew up in a different era. A far less understanding one.   
  
“I’ve never been angry with you either, even at your worst,” Adrien didn’t hesitate to point out. “Disappointed with you, sure, but it’s never been outright anger. I’ve always known you could do better.”

He was seemingly unaware of her plight. She knew she was spiraling, her mind going to the worst possible scenarios. And soon Adrien realized it too as his arms reached out to catch her when she fell.

“Hey, hey…” he whispered kindly into her ear. “I’m here for you Chloe, I’ve always got your back.”   
  
“...yeah, but you and who else? My best friend probably hates me, Marinette barely tolerates me. And my daddy? Heaven only knows how he’d react to… well, all of this.”   
  
“I’m sure he’d understand,” her fellow blond answered. “He’s your father.”   
  
“Oh, Adrien, I wish I shared your optimism. Or your naivete. You always want to see the best in people, right?” Chloe laughed sadly, fighting back a sob. “The world doesn’t work like that, you’ll understand someday. It’s cruel, it’s mean and it doesn’t let people have it easy. You and I are both proof of that really…”   
  
“But should we really give up all hope?” Adrien pointed out. “Besides, our city is championed by the Guardian of Good Luck. ...can’t we believe it’ll be passed down to us just a little?”

Chloe wished she could be so optimistic, but she was the cynic to her best -and now possibly only- friend’s optimist. Fate had never dealt a particularly good hand to her, with her whole world of issues. To list just a few: An overly protective father who called her the best thing since sliced bread, and an absent mother who would rather pretend she didn’t exist. It put her in this odd position of wanting to prove things to both, that she was worth their praise.

And, well, it was basically setting her up for trouble. So why should things start to turn around for her now? It wasn’t like they had before. So, as much as she appreciated Adrien’s honest optimism, well, she doubted things would start to really pick up for her anytime soon.   
  
Oh, she was crying again wasn’t she? God, she was going through so many tissues lately wasn’t she? The blond felt herself be pulled close into Adrien’s arms, him letting her cry without judgement.

“Hey, shh… it’s okay,” he whispered. “...there’s nothing to be ashamed about, I think you needed this. It’s been too long since you had a good cry hasn’t it? Oh Chlo, you’ve bottled things up for too long, internalized them. I’m here for you, like always.”   
  
That, at least, she knew to be true and she knew she could believe in. “...sure, we’ve got the Guardian of Good Luck as our champion, but what about Bad Luck? We’ve got him too. He’s probably canceling it out, right?”   
  
“Maybe,” Adrien admitted with a shrug. “Or maybe we make our own luck.”   
  
It was weird walking into school that next morning, honestly. She didn’t know what to expect. For the first time, she… was actually afraid. Sabrina wasn’t here to back her up for once. 

But one look at Marinette’s warm smile, her kind reassuring eyes seemed to pep her up. Yeah, okay, she wasn’t completely alone. She had her and Adrien. Maybe she did have this, right?

“You don’t have to come out to the class, you know that right?”

“No,” Chloe told her. “I have to do this. No hesitation, right?”   
  
“Right…”    
  
And so, with a deep breath, Chloe made her announcement and waited for whatever came next...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so... yeah. Honestly, Sabrina probably *should* drop Chloe as a friend in canon, but she's in a catch 22 situation. People don't want her as a friend as they know her as Chloe's bestie, and because she can't make friends she goes back to Chloe.
> 
> I'm not *entirely* sure she would stand up to Chloe like she did here, I don't know maybe season 4 will prove me wrong and she'll grow a spine. Put her foot down. The key difference here though, is well Chloe is trying at least to be a better person. Sabrina's just trying to figure some things out.
> 
> I'm not trying to make Chloe too weepy and mopey here, that's Hollywood style depression. She's just going through some Stuff right now.
> 
> And annoyingly, nobody can seem to work out when Arospec week actually began. Some say it's the 15th, some the 17th, and some the 21st. I'm going with it began yesterday, as that's when the prompts I was handed said it started.


	3. Day 3: Awareness

“...alright, listen losers, there’s something I have to tell you,” Chloe started, taking a deep breath and mentally counting to 5 to calm herself. No use freaking out so badly that she decided not to say anything. There were no acts of cowardice allowed. She had to get this out,  _ now.  _ “I… I…”   
  
She scanned the room, looking at expectant faces and others nervous about what she had to say. Then she saw their eyes, both Adrien and Marinette looking on and encouraging her. Urging her on. 

The words sped past her lips, maybe a bit too quickly in her nervousness.

“I’m… I’m Aromantic!”

And to her surprise, she was greeted with cheers and applause. Kubdel in particular let out a loud whoop.

“Ha!” she shouted. “I knew it!”

Warmth, acceptance. It was a… strange feeling, Chloe would admit. For once, the class stood with their Queen. They were cheering her on, hugging her in congratulations. Marinette, and more importantly Adrien for the first time in  _ ages  _ looked actually proud of her.

Oh, okay, her eyes were a little wet now. Okay, don’t cry in front of the class, a Queen wasn’t supposed to look this weak in front of her subjects. 

“I’m very proud of you Chloe,” said Ms. Bustier and  _ oooh  _ the look of approval in her favorite teacher’s eyes was weakening her resolve. It simply didn’t help. “I always knew you had the ability to stay true to yourself. I’m glad to see you as you really are.”   
  
Damnit.   
  
“Now, class,” she continued. “Let’s get on with our lesson, please open your textbooks to page…”

\-------

“So glad you finally took that bull by the horns, Chloe,” Kubdel said to her after class let out. “Didn’t think you had the nerve for a while, like I always kinda figured you were lying to yourself somehow. But didn’t know if you’d ever actually admit it.”   
  
“I’m so glad you had faith in me,” Chloe couldn’t resist the deadpan. “...your comments are appreciated.”

“Much obliged!” Kubdel beamed.    
  
“Yes, well, you’re right,” Chloe did admit. “I couldn’t just lie to myself anymore. It was… yeah, it was eating me up inside, gnawing at me.”   
  
“Yeah, I get that, I do,” Kubdel sighed. “I mean, in my case I guess I kinda always knew I didn’t want to date anyone. Just seeing bratty little kids at restaurants, their parents struggling to handle them? I didn’t want that to be me someday, y’know?”

“Ewww, yeah, no. I mean, sure I was probably a little terror to my parents, but I kinda get your point,” Chloe admitted. “...just, uh, yeah, I don’t want to be dealing with that sort of thing one day either. There are way more important things in life than kids!”   
  
“Like yourself?” Kubdel couldn’t resist the snark, even as Chloe rolled her eyes.

“Hahaha,” she laughed sarcastically. “You’re very funny, witty even.”   
  
“I try!” Kubdel preened.   
  
“So stop trying,” Chloe kept up the deadpan. “...but all jokes aside, there seriously  _ are  _ more important things than being a parent. Not that I think I’d make a great one anyways, like  _ wow  _ have you seen my upbringing? I don’t want to subject any hypothetical kid of mine to me risking repeating that cycle.”   
  
“Yeah…” Kubdel agreed. “...your parents are truly horrid aren’t they?”   
  
“Well, mom is at least. Honestly, I do sometimes wonder if Daddy is… really, you know, my daddy. I’ve heard her at times, you know,” Chloe sniffled, momentarily letting weakness show. “Bragging about her ‘conquests’. As if cheating on Daddy is anything to brag  _ about!  _ I couldn’t get a normal set of parents could I?”   
  
She saw the look on Kubdel’s face, a dawning realization quickly turning to pity. Chloe wasn’t sure if she actually liked that, having the little rabbit’s pity. She didn’t want to be known as a helpless case, a wreck barely disguising itself as a person. She wanted to be admired, not ‘tut tutted’ over, with sad looks tossed her way. She preferred reverence, jealously.

“Wow, just… uh, wow.”   
  
“Yeah,” Chloe sucked in a breath. She sniffled again, not really even sure why she was crying in front of the skater girl. Letting down her barriers and exposing herself to the world. She had to be looking pretty pathetic, honestly! “Can you imagine Kubdel? Not sure you can, but just try okay? Imagine your mother basically bragging about how many men she’s ‘scored’. Always having this thought in the back of your mind that your daddy isn’t your own.”

“God… yeah, I’m so sorry…” Kubdel seemingly tried to say, but was really rebuffed.

“Spare me your pity Kubdel,” Chloe argued weakly. “I know it’s not even real. You’re half-assing it.”   
  
“What, god no. Of course it’s real!” Kubdel argued. “What kind of person do you take me for? I’m not that kind of bitch. So can you stow your ego for just a minute and imagine that someone actually  _ does  _ feel pretty damn sorry for you. Not sure you can, but just try okay?”

Chloe winced, talk about having your own words thrown right back in your face. 

“Look, you keep pushing people away and they will end up not wanting to give a damn,” Kubdel actually  _ lectured  _ her. Like seriously, here was the street rat actually lecturing her! “Most people in this class may not have noticed, but you’re giving off a cry for help. Practically screaming it. So let us in okay?”

Chloe was at a loss for words briefly, basically being schooled by Kubdel. What could she actually say? Not that she could actually  _ argue  _ against it, given from what she’d seen the class was… really kind and caring almost to a sickening degree. They accepted  _ anyone  _ no matter who they were. Race and nationality simply didn’t matter to them. What did matter was how you  _ acted.  _ That was the important bit.

“I’ll try, Ku… Alix,” Chloe finally relented, baby steps right? “I’m not making any promises but…”   
  
“Try? Do. Or do not. There is no try,” Alix croaked out, apparently applying the wisdom of  _ that  _ old teacher to her words.   
  
“Ewww, really Alix? You had to go there? Be a nerd about this?” Chloe rolled her eyes. “You could at least be a weeb about it, and apply some All Might to it!”   
  
“HAH!” Alix laughed. “...There’s hope for you yet Bourgeois!”

Things weren’t so bad, Chloe reasoned. Sure it was a bit touch and go at the start but little by little she felt herself a bit more welcomed into the fold. 

“I’m really proud of you Chloe,” Marinette had to say. “You seem like you’re honestly trying to make a change.”   


“Baby steps, Marinette, baby steps,” Chloe replied. “I’m not saying I’m willing to make peace with all of the class just yet. Some of you… well there have been things said I’m not entirely willing to forget just yet.”   
  
“You don’t have to accept them all immediately,” Marinette kindly reassured, after a brief wince at Chloe’s treatment. Oh yes, so she did remember some of the things said about her behind her back. Good. “I’m not asking you to jump into the deep end of the pool just yet. Just wade in at your leisure.”

“You’ve got a good heart, Marinette,” Chloe replied. “Sometimes if I wonder if it’s too good. Too big. Yeah, sure I admire your belief in the fact that everyone can be friends but I haven’t forgotten the things said behind my back. That I’m… useless, a brat beyond redemption. I’m not totally heartless, I… I still feel.”   
  
Was she crying again? Damn it.

And Marinette was frowning, seemingly lost in thought. 

“...it reminds me too much of the things my mother said,” Chloe finally admitted after an awkwardly long silence. “...I know… I know some of it I deserve. It’s like I haven’t exactly  _ endeared  _ myself to my hive.”   
  
Marinette was nodding in agreement, before something Chloe said seemed to strike her. 

“Your… hive?” she asked, looking to her for clarification. 

“Yes, my hive. Don’t suddenly go deaf on me Marinette,” Chloe bit back before her tone softened. “I… I was Queen Bee once, for a time. Just once. Before, in my own stupidity I had my Miraculous taken from me.”   
  
Marinette nodded in seeming understanding, apparently remembering the subway incident.

“You wouldn’t understand what it’s like, of course you wouldn’t. How could you?” Chloe went on before hiccuping a sob. “But when you have a Miraculous, you… you have a connection. It’s hard to describe, but you feel like you’re part of something greater. You’re connected to the very fabric of the universe, maybe understanding it a little. Like, it’s all just us, in here, together. And we're all we've got.”   
  
A few weeks ago, if you’d have told Chloe she could understand what the universe was like, if only a little then… well, she’d have laughed in your face. She didn’t  _ care  _ about understanding the universe. The universe didn’t care for her, it was cold and unfeeling and cruel. She knew that. 

Of course she did. She’d already seen the evidence first hand. It had played a cruel practical joke on her by giving her mother to her as a parent. In the thinnest possible excuse for the word. But for a brief shining moment, she could peer into the universe’s heart and maybe comprehend. Until the connection was broken, and Pollen was taken from her thanks to her own stupidity.

And now here she was, despairing after the fact. She knew the possibility of Pollen being returned to her was very slim. In all likelihood, she’d probably disappointed the little kwami. Even worse, she’d disappointed  _ Ladybug. _

That was the end of it really. Having her miraculous returned to her wasn’t likely.

Now all she could do when akumas came was take cover and just watch at what could never be. Her, up on the rooftops of Paris, swinging from them as she saved the city and all would appreciate her. 

...well, all except her mother anyways. And… really that’s what she really wanted right? For her mother to even think of her as more than just ‘her spawn’. That was really why she’d taken the Miraculous wasn’t it? So her mother would acknowledge her. 

Ah, the rashness of a desperate teenager rushing for her parent’s approval. It led one to do some pretty damn stupid things. 

Though really, Chloe would never admit it aloud, she was… jealous of Marinette’s family. Sure, they were hardly rich, but at least they  _ cared  _ about her. She wanted that kind of thing, some warmth and a bit of laughter.

Instead she got an emotionally distant mother and an overly affectionate father spoiling her and never really apparently realizing what she really wanted. What a mess. It was… well, ridiculous. Utterly ridiculous. 

Okay, yeah, sure it was a bit more introspective than normal from her but she’d been forced to confront a lot of things lately. So sue her!

“I’m…” Marinette finally spoke, her eyes a little watery. “I’m sorry.”   
  
Though, for what Chloe wasn’t sure. The constant spitting hatred between them? Her parents being so much better than her own? Her Miraculous being taken away? 

“...thank you,” Chloe said before she could stop herself. “...god, we were idiots weren’t we?”   
  
“You can stop apologizing Chloe,” Marinette tried to say. “There’s been enough of that, from now on we just move forwards. To a better and brighter future.”   
  
“I don’t think I’ll ever be able to stop apologizing,” Chloe confessed. “There’s too much bad blood between us for me to ever stop. I want to clear the air, stop muddying the waters so much.”   
  
“Well…” Marinette said after some thought. “...so far, you’re off to a good start.”   
  
And again Chloe thought of the class. Sure, they seemed pretty cool with her today but what about tomorrow? They definitely hadn’t forgotten how horribly she’d treated them. It was doubtful they ever would. It was a horribly depressing thought. Once done, never forgotten.

“...yeah,” Chloe admitted. “But… but is it good enough?”

\-------

The pink didn’t really go away for the record, and Chloe rolled her eyes. It was so freakin’  _ ghastly.  _ Like, it was incredibly over the top, just blindingly frighteningly  _ pink _ . Had to be Lavillant’s work. Like who else could it have been?

“The idea that I have to be married to someone is ridiculous! Utterly ridiculous!” Chloe exclaimed in a fit of temper. “This utterly  _ blatant  _ amatonormativity is going to drive me up the wall.”

Okay, was it a bit rude? Probably. Maybe everyone  _ else  _ wanted to fall in love and that was cool, Chloe would be over the moon as soon as Adrien pulled his head out of his ass and admitted he  _ adored  _ Marinette. But the sheer  _ pressure  _ that Valentine’s Day put on someone to  _ date  _ was… yeah, no thank you!   
  
“Chloe…” Lavillant whined, from somewhere behind her. “...you could at least pretend to be supportive…”

“I am supportive!” Chloe replied. “I… I’m just going to be supportive from over there. You know,  _ outside  _ away from all this  _ pink  _ and all of these hearts! It’s so in your face! It reeks of amatonormativity.”   
  
“Yo, respect!” Alix piped up from inside the art room, more focused on her street art than anything else. 

“But…” Lavillant stammered. “...but what about romance?”   
  
“Did I stammer? Did I stutter?” Chloe asked. “...it’s just not me.”

“I know it’s not you,” Lavillant replied. “It’s just, well can you at least allow the rest of us to enjoy it? You… I like romance, and here you are saying I can’t!”   
  
...was that what she was really saying? Well, she supposed it  _ could  _ be taken that way. Crap.

“I… I just want to enjoy something I’m passionate about… It’s like something out of a fairy tale,” Lavillant sniffled. “...me being swept away by my prince or by my princess.”   
  
Oh dear, this… this could go badly if she didn’t do something, Chloe quickly realized.

“I’m sure that your-”   
  
But it was too late. A voice rose up.   
  
“Butterfly!”

Shit, shit, shit!   
  
“Lavillant, now you listen to me,” Chloe tried to reassure, kneeling down to the smaller girl’s level all the while keeping an eye on the sickly purple butterfly fluttering her way... “I’m sure your perfect princess will come along, in fact I know she will.”   
  
_ “If she ever works up the nerve! Honestly, the two dancing around each other is ridiculous! Utterly ridiculous!” _

“Stay positive Lavillant, that’s what you’re known for right? Being irritably upbeat?” Chloe asked, trying to ignore the irony in the situation. Here she was, trying to  _ stop  _ an akuma! “Lavillant, listen to me! Don’t let that ugly bug control you!”

But, alas, it was too late and Chloe saw the moment Hawk Moth took control. Chloe, on instinct slammed her fist into the rapidly developing akuma’s face, making it stagger. Then she ran for it.

_ “Oh for god’s sake, I even tried to stop this one!”  _ she thought frantically.  _ “...why me? This is revenge for Princess Fragrance isn't it?” _

And she heard the roar.

**_“Boooooooourgeois!”_ **

Oh boy. In a moment of panic, Chloe spared a look back and immediately regretted it. A twisted parody of a Princess arrived in the courtyard, wearing a tattered dress and covered in hearts. Ducking behind a corner. Chloe hoped she hadn’t been seen.

“I am Heartmaker!” the akuma roared. “I shall protect all romance!”

Oh boy.

_ “...well, at least it’s not Dark Cupid this time,”  _ Chloe thought.  _ “...though to an extent, I can kinda sympathize with him now.” _

Now, wisely, Chloe ran and hid. She’d been caught up in  _ way  _ too many akuma attacks by this point to even consider sticking around. After -unfortunately- causing one too many akumatizations, she’d started to develop a finely honed survival instinct.

She caught bits and pieces of the battle, seeing a red blur zip past on a wire.  _ “You got this Ladybug, nothing different from what you’ve faced before right? Just… just do this right okay? Be careful, don’t get hit by that thing. Last thing we want is you too love struck to fight alright?” _

Even if, Chloe thought with a little chuckle, that it would certainly make Cesaire’s LadyNoir ship sail!

So even as the sounds of battle came from outside, Chloe for the first time in her life didn’t actually try and get caught up in this fight. It would actually be… oh, honestly it’d probably make her stomach churn if the akuma had the power she thought it did. And more to the point, if the akuma used said power on her.

She didn’t  _ want  _ to fall in love with anything. ...okay, maybe her own reflection but she was a pretty girl, kinda sexy. No no, not the time girl! No time for preening, not right now! Just run and hide!

With a loud crash, her safety was disturbed as in came the akuma atop a white horse. Lockers flew everywhere, and Chloe was hiding behind the rubble. Taking cover behind a pile of lockers, she tried to stay as quiet as she could. Stay calm, breath and hope that the akuma didn’t see her.

“Where are you Chloe~?” the akuma sing-songed. “Come out, I just want to play…”   
  
And then an orange shape tackled her off her horse. With a crash, the wall caved in and from out of the smoke came Rena Rouge. Using her flute like a staff, she fended off the akuma’s furious onslaught.

Rena broke away, just in time for Cat Noir to crash through a window and take up the defence.

“This isn’t like you Rose,” Cat pleaded. “...you accept everyone! No matter who they are!”   
  
And Rena had mysteriously vanished. ...and wait, why was Couffaine in a wedding dress? Unless… oh! Okay, yeah, that was clever! 

As planned, the akuma rushed to embrace her ‘princess’. Hey, nobody ever said she was smart. But then, up she went dangling from her angle by Ladybug’s yo-yo. And up strode Lady Luck herself, grabbing something out of the akuma’s dress. A blackened card, it looked like.

And soon a red cleansing light washed over the school, warm and fresh like a summer’s day. It lifted your spirits, your very soul even. And for a time, all was well.

Chloe cried a little, upon the realization that again, she was forced to watch from a distance and even run and hide due to her own stupidity. Maybe one day… it was probably a faint hope, but it was all she had.

That night, she made a post.

**_TheOfficialChloeBourgeois:_** _I have a confession to make. For a while now, I’ve had this feeling. It’s only recently that I’ve been able to put a name to it, that… that something was different about me._

Was it a risk, exposing herself like this? Laying all to bare? Yeah, sure it was. But it was one she’d gladly take. Paris needed to know that their Queen stood with them. 

**_TheOfficialChloeBourgeois:_ ** _ I am Aromantic. Yeah, I said it. I’m totes Aro. As I said, it’s only recently I’ve been able to put a name to that feeling. I was… well, I thought I  _ **_had_ ** _ to have someone. Like that was how romance worked right? The sheer amount of amatonormativity is ridiculous! Utterly ridiculous. _

It required far more bravery than she knew she ever possessed. Oh, of course it would make it’s way back to her daddy. She knew it would. Her mother as well, though Chloe honestly doubted she’d suddenly start caring.

**_TheOfficialChloeBourgeois:_ ** _ the reason I make this post, well aside from the obvious is… well, I want to know I stan with you. Like, I stan being Aro. You’re not alone, whoever you are. You’ve got me by your side. Never let people dictate what you ‘have’ to be.  _

And just like that, she felt a weight be released from off of her shoulders. Yeah, she’d be catching flack from this. There would be blowback. Maybe a few people wouldn’t believe her. Not that she’d blame her. Her infamously ginormous ‘crush’ on Adrien was well known by this point.

But… all the same, it felt good to get it off her shoulders. Bear it to the world, and say ‘yes you were valid’ and that she stood with you. It was… well, the least she could do. Dabbing at her eyes, Chloe smiled and took in the cool night air.

Lights covered the city like a blanket, the honking of horns rising up from the streets as people went on about their night. It was like they didn’t even care that they were under siege by a magical terrorist. ...or they’d simply learned to hide it better. In the early days, Chloe could remember, there was a layer of fear over the city. It wasn’t spoken about, people just hoping Hawk Moth didn’t notice them. That Ladybug and Cat Noir would finish this off quickly.

Soon, it became evident that this would be an ongoing war. That Paris would be defended, and little by little hope would return. Support systems would be in place. Chloe hadn't been  _ that  _ dumb, that unobservant. She had noticed, even begged her daddy to set up some of those support systems. Even if it was really only to help him stay in office.

_ “...even when trying to help the city back then, I was motivated by selfishness,”  _ Chloe reminisced.  _ “I see not much has changed.” _

She barely noticed the thud of feet planting themselves on the balcony next to her. 

“I saw your post,” Ladybug said, for the first time Chloe noticing there was  _ something  _ familiar about her. What it was, she couldn’t place. “...you did a brave thing, you know that right?”   
  
“There’s a first time for everything, right?” Chloe laughed bitterly. “For once I’m not a coward. I’ve always been one. Even when I was Queen Bee, I was too cowardly to admit it I was just doing it to impress my mother. I honestly thought, as I was, I was going to save the city. That I was worthy to be called a hero.”   
  
“You have changed,” Ladybug, distant and unknowable as ever, appraised. “You’re grown up.”   
  
“Well, it had to happen sometime, right?” Chloe admitted. “I won’t keep you hanging on a lie Ladybug, I… I do wish I’d chosen to do this before I got Pollen. Well, stolen Pollen. That’s probably more accurate. God, I was such a brat right?”   
  
“Well…” Ladybug started.

“No, you don’t have to pretend. I’m an egotistical little girl. Not really worthy of being a hero. Just… just give it to me straight. It’s okay, I can take it.”   
  
“Well then,” Ladybug said and Chloe braced herself for what came. But what came she didn’t expect. “...you’re actually pretty worthy from where I stand.”

What?   
  
“You’re owning up to your mistakes, I’m proud. Before, I would never have given you back your Miraculous back. Not unless I had no other choice. Now though?” Ladybug mused. “It’s different.”   
  
And in her outstretched hand was a familiar octagonal box. No… it couldn’t have been. Dare she hope?

“Go on,” Ladybug urged her, softly and gently. “Open it. It’s not going to bite!”

And as she did, a little glow came from within forming into a shape. 

“Hello, My Queen!”

And Chloe cried. 

“P-Pollen?” 

“Ladybug told me everything,” the little god said, with the spotted heroine confirming it with a nod. “I’m proud of you My Queen, for stepping up when you did. You’re very brave. And standing with those marginalized, even at the expense of yourself? That’s the actions of a true hero.”

Chloe dabbed at her eyes, before holding the little god close.

“I’ll have you on our team,” Ladybug said. “If you want to be.”   
  
“You… you really think I’m worthy?” Chloe dared to ask, hesitantly.

“Obviously, otherwise I wouldn’t be asking!”

“O-Of course!” Chloe said, feeling like she was  _ wanted.  _ A rare thing to be sure. “Of course! I promise I won’t disappoint you Ladybug!”

And the Defender of Paris only smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, for the record I don't actually *dislike* Rose despite what this chapter may imply. It's just... well, you gotta remember her view of the world. She *likes* to be swept away by knights in shining armor, treated like a Princess. That sorta thing.
> 
> And along comes Chloe, who conflicts with that particular worldview and makes her disdain for romance being thrown right in her face known. Really, this is more Chloe's fault than anything else. Not respecting Rose's worldview. 
> 
> Also, yeah let's be honest Chloe would show her support and raise awareness via social media. She's constantly glued to her phone, after all. I'm not sure who it was that reminded me of this, I think it might have been River. Xe said to go that direction, have Chloe spread awareness that way. So I listened.
> 
> And yeah, obviously the circumstances of Queen Bee's advent are different this time. Ladybug's not choosing her out of desperation. She's choosing her as a hero because she's started to change. Because Chloe's actually *earned* it.


	4. Day 4: Positive and Negative Experiences

Paris became a rainbow of color, bathed in it under the shining sun. There was… an energy in the air, Chloe guessed you could call it. Everyone seemed just that extra bit cheery, like nothing could ruin their mood.

“...you know, I’m actually kinda wanting to  _ dare  _ Hawk Moth to try and pull something,” Chloe remarked, laying back in her deck chair. “Like, I want to see him try and ruin today.”   
  
“Please don’t,” Ladybug warned her, having apparently made it a point to stop by every so often. Just to see how Chloe was doing. “...I’d really rather you don’t tempt fate. The  _ last  _ thing I want to do today is fight Hawk Moth.”   
  
“Is something wrong?” 

Chloe wasn’t unobservant, hardly. You didn’t get to be the Queen without learning how to read people. What made them tick. And right now, she could tell something was bothering the hero.

“W-Wrong? No!” Ladybug stammered, in  _ obvious  _ denial. “W-What makes you think something’s wrong? Everything’s perfectly fine, right? N-Nothing’s wrong!”   
  
“First off, you’re stammering. Nobody stammers unless something’s obviously wrong,” Chloe didn’t hesitate to point out. “Secondly, you’re been practically biting your nails for the past five minutes. Not very lady-like, by the way. My mother would have a  _ fit  _ if she caught me doing something like that. So drop the act, alright?”

“The act?”   
  
Chloe couldn’t stop herself from rolling her eyes. “Stop bullshitting me LB. I’m your partner now, I gotta look out for you!”

“I don’t know if you’d even care…”   
  
“Like I said... Your. Partner. Of course I care,” Chloe said. “Whatever makes the team run smoother. If you’re off your game, the city suffers.”   
  
“I’m not even sure if this is up your alley…” Ladybug said, pressing her fingers together.

“It’s helping you right?” Chloe questioned. “Whatever it is, I’m sure it’s something I’d be glad to handle!”

“Y-Yeah, right…” Ladybug took a breath to calm herself. “Okay, uh, it’s like this. I have this friend okay? Kag- she, I like her very much. It’s just… well, I don’t know if she likes me back and-”   
  
_ “...hoo boy, romantic drama. ...so suddenly I’m the Guru of Gay now, is that right?” _

“So? Approach her in your civilian identity, I’m  _ sure  _ you’re  _ such  _ a  _ great  _ person under the mask,” Chloe advised. “Anyone would be a fool to turn you down!”   
  
“Y-Yeah, I suppose, it’s just…” Ladybug started, Chloe looking at her impatiently. She didn’t have all day! Getting the hint, the Hero of Paris went on: “...I don’t know how she’d take it…”   
  
“Well, you could come out. As Ladybug I mean,” Chloe suggested. “I’m sure if  _ Ladybug  _ can be gay or pansexual or whatever then your friend would understand. Assuming she doesn’t already. I’m sure she does, I know you choose your friends wisely. In any event, it’d give the LGBTQ+ kids of Paris something to rally behind. Someone! After all, if  _ Ladybug  _ comes out, nobody will have to be afraid anymore!”   
  
“Y-Yeah, you’re right,” the spotted heroine smiled at her. “Thanks Chloe!”

Her soul feeling a bit lighter, Chloe was later treated to a  _ sight _ . There was Ladybug, running across Paris on one of her nightly patrols but something was different about her. Most obviously, the bisexual flag flapping behind her in the night wind. Under the stars, all was revealed.

Instagram basically  _ blew up  _ overnight, the comments pouring in hard and fast. Reactions were posted, a few people applauding and some crying in joy. 

Chloe for her part, felt… proud. She did this.  _ She  _ convinced Ladybug to come out to the world, face her fears. For once… she’d actually managed to do something  _ good _ . It was… yeah, it was a new feeling. 

“We stan!” Alix said over lunch that next day, even as the Paris Pride Parade drew closer and closer with each passing moment. “Like, such a queen! Coming out like that… takes bravery. My big bro was crying, okay? These were happy tears alright?”   
  
“It… it is nice for the kids of Paris to have someone to look up to,” Kurtzburg mumbled, barely audible in nervous fashion. “...so often, we’re looked over, and ignored. It takes more and more people coming out like this for those in power to sit up and take notice.”   
  
“Well,” Alix said budging up to her friend. “...she stans for us. She stans for  _ you  _ Nath. You’re valid!”   
  
In came Marinette, with an extra pep in her step though why Chloe wasn’t sure. 

“Ladybug says gay rights!” she chirped, and it was  _ then  _ Chloe noticed the bisexual wrist band she wore. “...and she’s right!”

Alix let out a whoop as some of the class crowded around their newly out of the closet classmate. Chloe smiled faintly, now only if she had someone do that for people like her. Instead, she’d had to be that girl.

She’d had to come out and say ‘yes you’re valid’ to the Aromantic kids of Paris in a frankly unprecedented act of bravery. That she stood in solidarity with her peeps. No superhero had actually done that for her. 

_ “Oh well, as ever I’m forced to pick up the slack!  _

Honestly though, Chloe wished she had more support. She didn’t even know what her daddy thought! He’d been… strangely silent ever since she came out, not saying a thing. That was… well, it was a bit worrying honestly. Did he not support her? ...or did he not just know what to say?   
  
_ “I...I have to find out!” _

She’d never been one to hesitate. She always said what she thought, no matter how much it hurt. So, Chloe seized her chance. In a time of change for Paris, in a time of pride it would have been nice to have her daddy at her back.

Planting her feet, the blonde gathered up her courage stepping into his office. Yeah, okay, she had this. She got this right? Of course she did. She was  _ motherfucking  _ Queen Bee and she could confront her daddy on his unusual silence.

“...Chloe?” her daddy asked in surprise. “Is something wrong?”   
  
“Depends on how you look at it I guess,” Chloe mused, running her hand down the giant glass window as rays of sun filtered into the office bathing it in a warm glow. “...I mean, I’ve felt better than I have in weeks. I’m finally starting to understand who I am!”   
  
“Who… who you are?” her daddy asked, somewhat hesitantly. 

“I’m Aromantic daddy, it means I don’t want or desire love. At least… not like you love mom,” Chloe explained, resting herself on the windowsill. “But what I can’t figure out is… why haven’t you stood with me? You’ve stood silent, you haven’t said a word about  _ your own daughter  _ coming out!”

“Well, what can I say?” Andre stammered out. “What am I supposed to say?”

“Something, anything really,” Chloe demanded. “Just stand with your daughter, in solidarity right? I know my mom never will, she’s long given up caring.”

“I know dear,” her daddy replied comfortingly. “...it’s just, what am I supposed to say? This… this isn’t… it’s a phase dear, it’ll pass right? You’re not even sure.”   
  
“Not even…” Chloe sucked in a breath, the air growing several degrees colder. “...not even SURE?”   
  
The blatant amatonormativity! Her daddy had… he had to be joking right? This wasn’t  _ just  _ a phase! This wasn’t something she’d get over in a week and then suddenly change her mind about it. This wasn’t like shopping for a new dress, and then returning it to the store! Her mind had been made up. 

She was fighting back a snarl, she knew that much. Of course he didn’t understand, Chloe thought with a bitter laugh. Her daddy was old fashioned, he was from a different time. Hell, he probably thought being gay was something you got over as well right? Should she play the Ladybug card? Guilt trip him?   
  
(And yes, she was aware that sounded like she was in a game of Magic the Gathering, but sue her! She didn’t think of any other way to put it! She was pissed alright?)

“No, this isn’t something that will just  _ pass.  _ You make it sound like I’ve got the flu,” Chloe stammered angrily. “Like I’m  _ sick.  _ Daddy…”   
  
“Oh honey, no, I didn’t mean to make it sound like that. But you understand right?” her daddy tried to salvage the situation. Emphasis on  _ tried  _ really. “...there’s someone out there for everyone, right? I’m sure you’ll find him or her.”   
  
“HOW DARE YOU?” Chloe shrieked, practically spitting fire. “...someone out there for everyone? I don’t  _ want  _ someone! I’m aromantic. It means I spurn romance, I don’t want it. I’m happy if someone else gets it, but. I. Don’t. Want. It. Not for me anyways.”

“Okay, dear,” her daddy tried to reassure, even if she herself was having none of that. “..whatever you say.”   
  
She’d seen it before with her mother. Her daddy always backed down, cowed by her rage and demands. He curled inwards, like a turtle in his shell. Buckled down for the storm until it passed. It was ridiculous, utterly ridiculous. 

“Okay, let me put it another way,” Chloe explained. “Ladybug came out as bi last night. Are you going to say  _ that  _ is just a phase? Are you going to say that  _ Ladybug  _ doesn’t know what she herself wants?”   
  
_ “That she’s sick?”  _

It was left unsaid, Chloe daring her dad to make her go that far.

“N-No, of course not!” Andre stammered. “Ladybug knows what she wants. That’s different okay?”

“Is it really?” Chloe had to ask, the blonde unable to resist rolling her eyes. “Is. It. Really? Because… because from where I’m standing, it’s not alright? She’s made her choices, she’s made mine and it’s really not that difficult to accept.”   
  
“...it’s just, I want the best for you, okay?” her daddy tried to explain. “I want you to be happy. With someone who makes you happy.”   
  
“And I can get that, I can have friends. Romance isn’t the be end all of everything,” Chloe fired back. “It’s… it’s not just something I want to have for myself. It’s not a phase that’ll pass, it’s not like me suddenly deciding which tv show is my new favorite or me switching dresses. This is what I want to be.”

Was she crying now? Maybe a little. She’d thought her daddy would have her back on this, that he’d  _ accept  _ her. Instead…

(She kept a careful eye out for black butterflies. The mood was right, tempers were starting to fray. It would have been just like Hawk Moth to pull something on today of all days!)

Instead here she was explaining what was ultimately a simple concept to her daddy. Instead she was being rebuffed. Told she’d ‘get over it’. That… that hurt. Ugh, so this was a Thing now was it? 

Oh well, she’d deal with it in time. She had other places to be, and all involved her being far away from her daddy.

A cape flowed proudly from her shoulders now, green changing to white and then to black as coal. She was  _ The Queen  _ right now, and this whole city was her kingdom. A rainbow was all around, her fellow subjects marching in time.

Earlier worries just floated away as the sun shone brightly in the spring sky. The crowd marched in time, roaring and cheering. Reaffirming their identities. All were welcome, from all walks of life. 

Classes crossed the divide, leaped across barriers. No, that wasn’t right. Today, there were no barriers. Everyone, for once, was one and the same. Though… some would beg to differ.

A great streak of light in the sky, and an explosion. A knight stepped out of the smoke, armor white as the new fallen snow. He announced his presence, raising his sword to the sky. 

“I am Heteronormative Crusader! You will all conform to my wishes!”   
  
Clearly Hawk Moth had no imagination. Really? The armor? A white knight for ‘justice’. Pffft. What the hell was subtly? A real modern day Knight Templar. Oh crap. ...she recognized that voice. Daddy?   
  
_ “Oh come on!”  _ Chloe screamed to herself as she found a place to hide and to transform.  _ “This one wasn’t even my fault!” _

\-------

For the record, this was  _ not  _ how she ever reimagined her return as Queen Bee going down. Even as warm cleansing magic rushed over her, and she smelled the scent of honey her mind raced. 

Buildings flew by in a blur, the heroine racing along a rooftop, her mind moving equally fast. Again, her mistakes confronted her. If… if she hadn’t yelled at her daddy, none of this would happened right?   
  
_ “No, this isn’t your fault. It’s your daddy’s,”  _ the heroine reprimanded herself.  _ “It’s not your fault he refused to accept you as you are. It’s his own. All you’re doing is picking up the pieces. Really! Hetronormative Crusader, the white knight. Honestly Hawk Moth, I know you can do better!” _

Taking a flying leap to the air, she threw her trompo letting it pull her along to the next rooftop. Letting go, she plummeted to the streets before crashing into the roof of a car. The metal caved in, even as she leapt to the side of a building running along it.

_ “...damn it Hawk Moth! Have you no standards?”  _ Queen Bee thought to herself. She couldn’t be Chloe, not right now anyways.  _ “This is a day of happiness, and you just had to go and ruin it. I bet you’re projecting aren’t you? You’re the  _ **_real_ ** _ Hetronormative Crusader aren’t you?” _

As she rushed by a window, it reflected her like a mirror. That familiar yellow and black was now joined by green and white. Ribbons of Aromantic Pride flowed from her hair, obviously a subconscious decision added to her costume.

It filled her with a sort of confidence, blazing like an inferno inside her. Her footsteps were light, like that of an angel’s. She barely felt any weight even as she zipped to another rooftop in pursuit of the villain.

Ahead, steel clashed against steel with sparks flying. The massive suit of armor gleamed in the sun, Cat Noir holding back the villain’s sword with his baton. He broke away, cartwheeling across the rooftop. 

“Geez, what a  _ knightmare  _ right?” he punned, before splitting his staff in half and throwing a part of it. It spun in the air, beaning Hetronormative in the helmet. “Look, I’m sure you have a lovely wife and I suspect it was probably a beautiful  _ welding  _ but that armor of yours? Talk about heavy metal. And I do mean heavy!”   
  
Cat was easily dancing around the akuma, which thanks to the suit it wore was much slower to move. His fist  _ easily  _ slammed into its gut in a lightning fast maneuver. 

With a roar, Crusader swung his sword and Cat dived under the blade. For the first time, Queen Bee noticed the armband. It was an interesting set of shades, red turning to white to blue like a duller American flag. 

Her foot crashed into the villain’s helmet, making him stagger. She backflipped off of his head, and landed beside Cat.

“Queen Bee?” he asked, surprised. Obviously Ladybug had yet to fill him in. “...Well, I can’t deny that it’s bee-utiful to see you! I’m all  _ abuzz  _ with excitement. Glad to see you’re wearing your colors by the way!”

“If this is what Ladybug has to deal with every day…” Queen Bee muttered, groaning from the bad jokes. What was it with the blondes in her life and puns? What, was it like a disease? “She can have you!”   


“All, you don’t like me subjecting the villains to pun-ishment?” Cat asked, fending off the villain’s sword with his baton again. Easily, he deflected the strikes and met them. “But they’re a-mew-singly so good! Like, I’m not  _ kitten _ around! Some of these I’ve been waiting to bust out for  _ weeks!  _ It’s so claw-ful though that I had to start using them around this guy though!”

“Easy kitty,” Ladybug said, sliding under the villain’s saber only to kick him in the stomach in a spin -resembling a breakdancer- before leaping back up onto her own two feet. “Really, he’s not worth it. Like, you can save them for another time right?”   
  
“Or keep them locked away in your head,” Queen Bee added as the three stood against the villain. “Whatever works!”   
  
“Chloe, my darling daughter,” the akuma said in a faux friendly way and it churned her stomach to hear her daddy’s voice coming out of  _ that  _ thing. Sure he was flawed, but she still loved him. “...come back to me, I promise I still love you. No matter your… decisions.”   
  
Chloe suppressed a growl. It wasn’t her daddy saying these things. It wasn’t… right?   
  
“If you were my real daddy, you’d know that these weren’t  _ just  _ decisions,” Chloe, not Queen Bee said as she leapt up on the akuma’s sword. Her foot shot out, nailing the creature square in the chin making it stagger. “I am who I am! Nobody can dictate that for me. Not you, not my daddy, not my mom! Are you hearing this Hawk Moth? Go take a hike! Educate yourself!”   
  
Her eyes blazed with a new fire, arrogance and ego long since forgotten. Now there was only a city crying out for justice in her mind. Marginalized people who needed her help.  _ Her _ people. 

“Look out!” Ladybug shouted only for Hetronormative Crusader’s arm to shoot out and smash her into the side of a building. 

Chloe’s eyes widened, her breath catching itself in her throat. She knew the suits took punishment, but… all the same… Okay, okay. Deep breaths, Ladybug had taken worse hits… right?

She saw the akuma raise his sword above her head. Oh god. No amount of magical protection would save you from being cleaved in half! The blade came down, and like lightning the prince protected his lady. His baton barely held back the blade.

With a roar, the akuma swung wide, Cat just barely diving under the slash. This was getting dangerous, Queen Bee realized. They had to end this fast.

_ “No way I’m going to ever get close enough to use my Venom on this guy, not with that sword of his!”  _

And then dark energy raced into Cat’s paw, and the roof crumbled beneath them. They crashed into a warehouse below, dust and smoke filling the air. And when it finally cleared, Queen Bee bore witness to the akuma, dragging his sword behind him in a show of sparks.

“Chloe, please,” the akuma pleaded. “I’ll forgive you for your choices in life, all you have to do is give me… YOUR MIRACULOUS!”   
  
The sword slashed with a purpose, metal ringing as it scythed through the air. Queen Bee leapt backwards, now her back literally against a wall.

“Well, it’ll be hard to do that when I’m dead…” Queen Bee asked, rolling to the left even as Hetronormative Crusader shoved his blade forwards. It shoved itself into brick, apparently stuck. “...right? No, seriously, dad, you’re the mayor. It utterly  _ cannot  _ be good for your re-election campaign if you have three dead kids on your hands!”   
  
“Money fixes everything, right? People can be made to forget,” the akuma replied, pulling his sword out in a shower of mortar. “...besides, I don’t need you  _ alive  _ to rip those jewels off of your bodies!”

Queen Bee flipped, over the blade and over the akuma’s head. It whirled around, blade still in hand as it threatened to decapitate her. The heroine slid under the blade even as Cat ground his baton up against it, sparks flying.

She could only watch as Cat dueled the akuma, meeting his blade with easy expertise. Somehow, Queen Bee had  _ sworn  _ she’d seen those sword fighting skills somewhere else before. They were uncannily familiar in style. 

_ “No. Focus on the akuma, not on trying to work out who Cat Noir is!”  _ she reminded herself.  _ “Come on Ladybug, we need you! Pull yourself together! Otherwise we’ll all be laying, bleeding out in pain. Or worse!” _

Then came a familiar call, magic filling the air like a fresh early spring breeze.

**_“LUCKY CHARM!”_ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** Luck was indeed a lady, or at least a spotted one as in dived Paris’ savior wielding… wait, was that a sword?   
  
“Finally, something useful!” Queen Bee called. “...I hope you fence, Ladybug!”   
  
“...yeah, I hope so too…” Ladybug admitted as she and Cat held back the akuma’s sword. “Queen Bee, we’ll hold him back for you! You just sting him!”   
  
Before Queen Bee could call for her attack, the akuma used his superior strength to force the heroes off him. They were sent flying, a polka-dotted sword crashing to the ground with a clatter. 

“...okay then, that… uh, yeah that could have gone better!” Cat admitted rubbing his head in pain even as Hetronormative Crusader advanced. His sword scraped the wall, carving it up.

“My dear Queen Bee, I didn’t mean to harm your father, to hurt your relationship with him,” another voice took over, a purple mask over the akuma’s face. “All I ask is that you let me have what it is I desire.”   
  
Queen Bee wiped the tears from her eyes. Hawk Moth had nothing to do with her and her father’s relationship. Unable to stop herself, she snarled: “Like hell!”   
  
“You’re not even worthy of that power,” Hawk Moth said, controlling Andre’s body like a puppet. “You’re ruled by your own ego, so why did Ladybug take you back. You’re no superhero, you’re a villain like me.”   
  
“Stop it…” Queen Bee whispered dodging a punch from the akuma. “Shut up!”

“You know it’s true, that you could make fine supervillain material. Ladybug knows. That’s why she took away your Miraculous the first time,” Hawk Moth continued. “What makes you think she won’t take it away again?”   
  
In the back of her mind, Chloe would admit she had those doubts. Those fears nagging away at her. She’d crashed a train, the very first thing she did was put people in danger when she grabbed power. And for what? All to prove something to her mother? Hawk Moth  _ was  _ absolutely  _ right.  _ She was dangerous.

“No, don’t listen to him!” Ladybug pleaded, Queen Bee looking back at her pleading face. “He’s just trying to mess with your head!”

Yeah, those fears could be proven a reality Chloe would admit. But… all the same, she wouldn’t let them control her. Ladybug had faith in her, she’d  _ given  _ her the Miraculous back. So why couldn’t she have faith in  _ her? _

“Oh shut up,” the heroine snapped, tossing a dirty glare towards Hawk Moth. The fabulous emancipation of Queen Bee had reached its final stage. Now she was ready to take flight. “...you don’t know anything about me. I can be better, I  _ have  _ to be better. Haven’t you heard? I’m the motherfucking Queen Bee and you’re causing trouble in  _ my  _ hive. So  _ buzz off,  _ you hear?”

Queen Bee knew what she had to do, tossing the sword towards the akuma’s head. It spun like a boomerang, cutting through air like a scythe. There came a shout from Cat, one of fear. But as planned, Hawk Moth made his creation dodge. And then came the sting.

“VENOM!”   
  
Queen Bee struck, thrusting her arm forwards and whispering an apology to her father. The akuma went rigid, seizing up. 

The knight wore a sash, and it was seized before it was ripped apart. And Ladybug said bye bye to a little butterfly.

**_“MIRACULOUS LADYBUG!”_ **

A wave of red washed all over Paris, repairing all that had been destroyed. Bricks and mortar put themselves back together and steel reshaped itself. All that had been trashed was given a loving repair.

“Ugh, Chloe?” Andre groaned out, rubbing his head. “...where was I? What happened? Oh no, was I an akuma?” 

“Pound it!” all three heroes exclaimed, doing it so well you’d be forgiven in thinking it had been practiced beforehand. 

But all the same, if this was a win… why didn’t it feel like a victory?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, yeah, Andre is... well, he's an interesting character for me. I honestly do believe he loves his daughter and he is Trying but... well, he's partially responsible for his own daughter's issues. It's not just Audrey who we have to blame here.
> 
> He's giving her the world, and I *suspect* that may have contributed to his own daughter's entitlement issues. Just a hunch. That being said, I honestly believe he does love her and is just trying to make up for his wife's Utter Failings as a parent.
> 
> Mind, it's an interesting thought experiment as to what he'd think of his own daughter not 'conforming' to what is expected of her. Maybe he'd secretly support her, but is unable to say anything publicly as he wants to keep his office. Or maybe he is just that old fashioned. As it's never come up and doubtfully will, I can only speculate.


	5. Day 5: Community

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warnings: Depression

After the… incident, Chloe hadn’t really heard from her father. Oh sure, he knew she  _ existed  _ but for whatever reason he didn’t seem overly keen on speaking to her.

Whatever.

It wasn’t like she wanted to speak to him either.

How could have things gone so wrong so fast? Barely a week ago, all was right in her world. Her daddy loved her, she was still friends with Sabrina and that was all she needed right?

Except…

Chloe rubbed her hand unconsciously, some part of her knowing that was usually where her stinger rested. Except… a week ago she’d been hated by the city for nearly causing a train wreck.

How did that old line go? Oh yeah…   
  
_ “With great power… comes great responsibility.” _

Funny, she considered herself the responsible one in her family and yet… Ha! She’d hardly lived up to that claim back then right?   
  
_ “I traded the love of my family and my best friend for the respect of the city and a new friendship with Ladybug. It’s worth it, right?” _

Right?   
  


\-------

**_What would you think if I sang out of tune?_ **

**_Would you stand up and walk out on me?_ **

The song fed itself into her ears, not something Chloe  _ usually  _ listened to given it was decades old and had been on and off the radio  _ years  _ before she’d been born. But… for whatever reason she’d found herself listening to it.

It had to have been from a CD Adrien had lent her, yeah that made sense. The overly mushy lyrics definitely seemed like something he’d enjoy. Most of the stuff she listened to was really as bitter as her soul.

Goddamnit, could her foot not tap to the beat for  _ one friggin’ minute? _

Okay, so she admitted it. It was  _ kinda  _ catchy...

**_Lend me your ears and I'll sing you a song_ **

**_And I'll try not to sing out of key_ **

The song kept itself stuck in her head for the rest of the day, leaking into the next day as well damnably. It was a classic earworm.

Embarrassingly, Chloe even found herself whistling the tune as she walked up the stairs to the school.    


Hopefully nobody heard her, she had a reputation to keep up. ...oh crap, Adrien must have heard her judging by the utterly  _ impish  _ smile he was sending her direction.

“So…” he commented in all too innocent fashion. “Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band huh?”

“Oh hush,” Chloe rolled her eyes. “Just stop, you have nobody but yourself to blame. I found that CD you lent me, I listened to it -no, don’t ask me why, I don’t know either- and now it’s stuck in my head!”

“Well, it’s not like it’s a  _ bad  _ album…” Adrien put in. “You gotta respect the classics!”   
  
“Yeah, except in this case by classic you mean utterly antique,” Chloe pointed out in response. “The entire band broke up decades before you or I were ever born!”   
  
“Good music?” Adrien shrugged. “It’s pretty timeless!”   
  
“Chloe? You’re listening to the Beatles?” Lahiffe shot her an approving grin and a thumbs up. “Duuuuuuuuuudettte!”   
  
Great, now the whole school would know before the day was out! So embarrassing…

“If it helps, Kitty Section often practices to a lot of classic rock,” Adrien shrugged. “So you’re not the only one in our class listening to music before our time.”

“Still, it’s so embarrassing…” Chloe grumbled. “...it’s  _ so  _ mushy and so old! Like, this is the kinda music my…”   
  
She suddenly paused, realizing what she was about to say. The words were starting to form on her lips, not that she wanted them to. 

“Your dad listens to?” Adrien finished for her, noticing his best friend’s expression. “...I’m sorry Chloe, about your father I mean. He’s being an ass.”   
  
“Gee, you think?” Chloe muttered bitterly, caustically. “...what’s changed? It’s not like I’ve changed! I’m still  _ me  _ right? I’m still the daughter he raised! Just because I don’t want to date anyone doesn’t mean I’m not valid or anything right?”   
  
Adrien kept a watchful eye out for butterflies even as he hugged her. He gave a long sigh, one of complete understanding. “...your dad’s stubborn, that’s all.”   
  
“Oh really?” Chloe laughed, still in a bitter tone. “I hadn’t guessed.”

“Give him time,” Adrien suggested, and Chloe wanted to flatout laugh at his optimism. Never change! “He may still come around. Just give him time okay? You’re right, you’re still his daughter. Maybe he’ll realize that?”

“I wish I shared your optimism, Adrien,” Chloe admitted. “...you’re always trying to see the best in people, I wish I shared that. But my family… well, you know what my family is like. They’re stubborn, set in their ways.”   
  
“Your dad isn’t your mother, Chlo,” her friend said reassuringly. “He’s… different, he does care for you. Sure, he made a mistake but maybe he’ll come around? You should give him some time, wait and see what happens. Don’t cut him out of your life just yet okay?”

Chloe groaned long and loud, were it anyone else she’d have told them to buzz off and yet… This was different. This was  _ Adrien _ . Sure, she didn’t entirely share his optimism but all the same she  _ wanted  _ to believe he was right.

Maybe she should.

_ “Alright, but only because it’s you Adrien,”  _ she thought.  _ “Were it anyone else, were it literally anyone else I’d tell them to take a hike.” _ _   
_ _   
_ “Okay, but only because it’s you,” Chloe told him. “...I’ll believe in my dad because I believe in you alright? Maybe you’re right, maybe he will come around. I guess I’ll just have to wait and see huh? I’ll give him a few days, and maybe then…”   
  
“We can only do just that, wait and see,” Adrien nodded. “I know it’s hard Chlo. But your dad will come around. He does love you.”   
  
Again, Chloe wished she could share his optimism. But her whole life had been like something out of a soap opera. It was messed up, and almost beyond insane. ...she actually envied Marinette, honestly. At least both of her parents loved her.

And that’s what it had all come down to in the end wasn’t it? Her pure hatred of Marinette, it had been fueled by envy. Her being the eye of the class, and her having actually  _ loving  _ parents. God, what a mess!

  
  
**_Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends_ **

**_Mm, I get high with a little help from my friends_ **

So, face front and put on her best (fake) smile. Pretend everything was alright and then… maybe it would be.

**_Mm, gonna try with a little help from my friends_ **

Marinette  _ did  _ notice her change in mood, perceptive as she was. It was kinda scary, actually. 

“...you alright Chloe?” she asked between classes. “You seem… down. N-Not that I’m saying you’re depressed or anything, but you seem… just down. Like, you’re missing the usual pep in your step.”

“Of course I’ve been down, Marinette,” Chloe replied. “...you know why, and it’s not any of your business.”   
  
“Mhmm, I disagree,” Marinette murmured, musing to herself. “...you’re my friend Chloe. Still getting used to saying that, but you’re my friend. So I worry. N-Not that I worry you’re falling into depression but-”   
  
Chloe pressed a finger to her lips. “You’re babbling again, Marinette. I appreciate the thought Marinette, but there’s not much you can do. This is something I have to handle myself.”   
  
“H-Handle yourself?” Marinette stammered. “...you don’t have to, you shouldn’t have to weather this alone. Chloe, we’re your friends. We’re here for you.”

It was a… weird feeling to say the least, that strange warmth in her chest she couldn’t quite place. She didn’t have friends, she had  _ followers. _ Ladies in her court. 

A flash of orange hair raced through her mind. ...well, maybe she had just one friend. Maybe. But even she was gone now. 

And yet… here was her former archenemy still sticking with her when everyone else was gone. Chased away to more traditional princesses presumably, ones who actually shone like diamonds.

“Chloe, you don’t even look like yourself,” Marinette muttered in observation running a hand through her hair. “Oh gods, look at this, this is a mess. It’s just  _ barely  _ straightened. How has nobody noticed? Oh, when did this happen? You look like a hot mess.”   
  
So she  _ had  _ noticed. Chloe didn’t really  _ care  _ per say that she had noticed, considering nobody else seemed to really care about her change in appearance. Nobody else in her class seemed to have commented.

“Wait… are you…” Marinette muttered reaching into her bag. “...you’re not even wearing makeup. It’s like you don’t even care.”

She led Chloe into the bathroom, still searching through her bag.    
  
“Well, maybe it’s a whole new look,” Chloe said even as Marinette brought out her emergency supplies. “Maybe I want people to see a whole new me, show them that I’m trying to change. Is that so wrong?”   
  
Marinette rolled her eyes in the mirror, even as she began straightening the blonde’s hair a bit better.

“I was in a rush this morning,” Chloe said, hoping it didn’t actually sound like she was making excuses. “I wanted to get to school on time, I have a reputation for punctuality to keep up. I am the Mayor’s daughter, I absolutely  _ cannot  _ be seen being late.”

Marinette made an ‘mhmm’ sound, almost like she didn’t believe her.

“You of all people should understand,” Chloe went on, even as her friend(?) continued doing her hair. “You’re the Class Representative, you are what the rest of the school sees. What does it say to Francois Dupont if you are late? How do you think that reflects on the rest of the class?”   
  
“This isn’t about me,” Marinette argued. “This is about you.”

  
  
**_What do I do when my love is away?_ **

**_Does it worry you to be alone?_ **

“Why do you care anyways?” Chloe asked. “You’ve hated me for years, I’m amazed you’re still giving me the time of day.”   
  
“I don’t hold grudges, not easily,” Marinette explained. “Yeah, okay, yeah sure you  _ were  _ a horrible person but-”   
  
“No need to rub it in…” Chloe muttered, and was ignored.   
  
“-we’ve been over this,” Marinette went on, the little Chinese girl pulling her friend’s longer hair back into a ponytail. “You’ve changed, that’s what matters to me. That’s the important part, right? You’re not that girl anymore.”

“Thanks, I guess,” Chloe replied. “It’s just… what if this is only temporary? What if I snap back to being  _ that girl  _ by next week? I’m… scared, actually. I don’t know if I can change.”   
  
And of course, Marinette was having none of that. Her gaze hardened even as she started on the blonde’s makeup. “I believe you can, so none of that self-deprecation. You’re…. Different from how you used to be, a good different.”   
  
By now, she was applying a bit of blush and some other things. Touching up her skin, even as the clock ticked away with little time left. 

“You’re Queen Bee again, right?” Marinette questioned. “I heard from the Ladyblog that you had a  _ proper  _ debut as a hero. I’ve seen you on patrols you know, zipping across the city on your trompo.”   
  
Of course Marinette had been watching her. Maybe it had been with suspicion, Chloe honestly wouldn’t have blamed her. She was probably watching for her next screw up. Well, in that case she should expect to be disappointed.

This time, Chloe knew, she was doing this whole superhero thing right. As she said to Hawk Moth, she was  _ Queen Bee  _ now and Paris was her hive. It was… weird, thinking of the city like that. Like all of it was under her protection. But it was a nice little weird feeling, warm like the summer sun.

Whenever she felt that magic wash over her, at times she felt like crying in joy. It was refreshing, cleansing in some ways. It smelled of honey and felt like the sun. It wasn’t like being Antibug, which felt  _ wrong  _ and dirty like her very soul had been tainted.

**_How do I feel by the end of the day?_ **

**_Are you sad because you're on your own?_ **

“I hate to disappoint all the naysayers,” Chloe said. “But I won’t be that girl again. Chloe Bourgeois was  _ an idiot.  _ Too proud in herself, a spoiled brat. No, I’m Queen Bee, I have to be different. Ladybug had faith in me, I don’t want to prove her wrong.   
  
And was that… pride in Marinette’s eyes?   
  
“Well then,” she said. “You’re off to a good start.”

  
  
**_No, I get by with a little help from my friends_ **

**_Mm, get high with a little help from my friends_ **

**_Mm, gonna try with a little help from my friends_ **

Chloe did search for shows of solidarity though, to know she wasn’t alone. Truth be told, she’d kinda lied to Marinette about why she was so fast out of the house. It was… awkward being around her father right now.

That being said, it was nowhere  _ near  _ as awkward as a high society dinner. Whispers came from all around her even as she walked in, and it took a great amount of courage not to turn and run. She did what she always did around people she didn’t like -which was still a great many it must be said- and that was turn up her nose and keep her head held high.

Put on her best (fake) smile, and hoped nobody saw through it. She’d be shaking hands, complimenting people but there would be no real honesty to her words. Her eyes would betray her, hiding explicit disgust for all involved.

_ “Hey, isn’t that the Mayor’s daughter? Didn’t she come out as Aromantic recently?” _ _   
_ _   
_ _ “Whatever, it’s probably just a phase right? She’s a teenage girl, their moods change as often as the winds.” _ _   
_ _   
_ _ “It’s probably a cry for attention, it’s not even real.” _ _   
_ _   
_ _ “Pfft, you’re so right. It’s probably a publicity stunt, the mayor having his daughter say this so he can be seen as supporting and acceptive.”  _

_ “Wasn’t he akumatized though? Over his daughter’s choices?” _ _   
_ _   
_ _ “No, he was just being a bigot. It was his true nature shining through, well I know who I’m not voting for!” _

Oh, did she mention, she  _ hated  _ being amongst the rich?   
  
“...I really hate this,” a redhead near her muttered, dressed in a suit and tie as a display of nonconformity. “...don’t these assholes have anything better to do than besides gossip about their personal lives?”   
  
Oh, did she mention, she wasn’t alone in her hatred?   
  
“But that’s really all we do,” Chloe grinned. “...or haven’t you heard?”

“Whatever,” Alix rolled her eyes. “You all need new hobbies!”   
  
Chloe just took a very pointed bite of her apple.   
  
“Seriously, what does it matter what your life choices are?” Alix asked again. “Honestly, I bet half of these fools have some little secret to hide!”   
  
People forgot a lot of things, if you were to ask Chloe. People forgot Marinette knew a few famous people. People forgot Sabrina’s daddy was a police officer. People forgot when she put her mind to it, she herself could get some good grades. And really, a  _ lot  _ of people forgot Alix was stinkin’ rich.

Like filthy rich. People forgot she was the daughter of the director of the Louvre, and people forgot that was a  _ really  _ big deal. 

“How so?” Chloe remarked. “What’s your theory?”   
  
They were on an upstairs balcony, away from all of the chaos. From all of the snobs and all of the wine and all of the polite greetings. Here, they could bitch to their heart's content.

Truth be told, Chloe had… never considered Alix as a potential ally against soul crushing boredom. She knew they went to the same parties and all but due to her own bias she didn’t consider her a possible friend.

After all, anyone who was pals with  _ Dupain-Cheng _ had to be  _ utterly _ worthless right? Wow, she had been ridiculous. Truly utterly, impossibly ridiculous.

“Okay, yeah, see that guy?” Alix pointed out. “The oily one?”   
  
“Which one?” Chloe snorted. “They’re all pretty oily.”   
  
“Right there, by the desserts table,” Alix said and Chloe followed her gaze. Ah yes, she saw him now. “...you haven’t noticed, but I have.”   
  
“Noticed what?”   
  
“Thank you for confirming my theory, dipshit,” Alix rolled her eyes with Chloe ignoring the insult. “Anyways, watch him okay? He’s trying to spare glances at the dude over there across the room. He’s trying not to be noticed. Gaaaaaaaaaaaay. Like, he is gay as hell.”   
  
Chloe followed the man’s gaze and realized she was trying not to laugh. Like, Alix was right. It was a mix of pitiful and hilarious how so unsubtle the man was actually being. 

“So? What’s wrong with being gay?” Chloe asked, leaning on the balcony railing. 

“Well, nothing. BUT!” Alix held up a finger. “This isn’t normal gay Paree. This is high class gay Paree. This is expensive nibbles and wine and white collar crime and nice clothes. This is ‘conforming’. Bleagh.”   
  
Again, Alix drew attention to her tuxedo with a gesture to herself. 

“Okay, point made,” Chloe admitted with a grumble. “How’d you even get in the door?”   
  
“I walked in,” Alix deadpanned. “But not without a ‘look’ or two, which pfft I don’t give a damn. I’m livening up the place, challenging peep’s perceptions. If I can get one or two of them to think that they don’t have to ‘conform’ to society’s expectations then I can be happy. I’m like nicely pressed anarchy in black.”   
  
Chloe snorted.

“While you socialize, I challenge,” Alix said, grabbing the apple out of her hands and tossing it. It landed square in a particularly nasty socialite’s head. She had spotted him, flirting with a woman several years his junior. “Of course, we could switch it up. You could start challenging people’s perceptions of what a woman could be!”

“And leave you dealing with those morons?” Chloe asked. “I’m cruel, but I’m not  _ that  _ cruel! No no, we stand in solidarity together.”   
  
“Respect,” Alix said fist-bumping her friend. “You’re really starting to come around, Chloe. A few years ago, I wouldn’t even be bothered to try dealing with you. I like this new thing of ours.”   
  
“You make it sound like we’re dating, in which case…” Chloe gagged. “Ewwwwww.”   
  
“Yeah, ewwww,” Alix acknowledged. “Good point!”

Yeah, it wouldn’t be so bad from now on.   
  
“I’m so glad you’ve decided to challenge things, like I really am. Taking amatonormativity and giving it a good swift kick in the pants,” Alix remarked. “The societal pressure to date? No thank you, I don’t need that in my life.”   
  
Okay, yeah, now Chloe knew something was up. As it’s probably been mentioned before, but being a bitch meant you knew how to read people. Find out what made them tick, what  _ bothered  _ them.

And something was bothering Alix, that much Chloe was sure of.

“Alright, I’ll bite,” Chloe said. “Who said what? You need me to sting someone? String them up by their pants?”   
  
“Funny, but no,” Alix replied. “It’s just… that, well, you know that sweethearts ice cream dude?”

_ Oh no.  _ Yeah, Chloe had a feeling where  _ this  _ was going.

“I’ve known this for most of my life, really. What I am,” Alix muttered. “But.. it still hurts when people just  _ assume  _ y’know? That dude, I forgot his name just gave me this  _ look  _ y’know? He was just giving me this pitiful look, like…”   
  
Like she was something to actually be pitied.   
  
“Okay, yeah, no I’m stinging him,” Chloe said, her mind made up in an instance. “Don’t even try and stop me!”   
  
“What? No!” Alix barked out, sharply and almost as quickly. “You’re a superhero now, you can’t actually be seen doing that!”   
  
“So I’ll break into his house in the middle of the night,” Chloe decided. “Then I’ll sting him.”   
  
“Do you even know where he lives?” Alix tilted her head interrogatively. 

“Well, no, but…” Chloe stammered. “I-I’ll figure it out okay?”

Alix snorted. “Labels are tough.”   
  
“You shouldn’t have had to deal with that,” Chloe said. “That guy’s a bastard, he’s clearly thinking that something’s wrong with you. Like you have no room for love in your heart.”   
  
“Which is wrong, obviously,” Alix confirmed. “I’m not a damn sociopath. I love my dad, I love my bro even as scatterbrained as he is!”

Alix took another sigh.

“I… just don’t think he understands, of course he doesn’t,” she went on. “Day in and day out, he sees couples truly in love come to him and he gets all mushy and all gooey and then he sees me. Someone like me who has nothing but friendship on her mind. It… conflicts with his worldview.”   
  
“You’re saying you pity him?” Chloe asked, wondering what Alix was honestly getting to. And  _ why  _ did this sound so familiar?

“Maybe a bit, yeah,” Alix admitted. “I’m not saying he’s  _ right  _ but I do pity him. And I pity your dad.”   
  
Ooooooh, so there it was. That was why this all sounded so familiar. Lovely.

“...ah, so you’re trying to make a point,” Chloe sighed to herself. “That’s what all of this is.”   
  
“Maybe I am, maybe I’m not,” Alix shrugged. “It’s just… well, even as wrong as your dad is? And believe me, he’s very wrong, he… yeah, I can’t help but pity him.”   
  
“Even after he got turned into an Akuma preaching heteronormativity?” Chloe asked, glancing at her nails. “Which, by the way, is so overrated. Outmoded even!”

“Even after,” Alix confirmed. “Maybe he’ll try and understand you, maybe he won’t.”   
  
“I’m betting on the ‘won’t’ part myself,” Chloe put in.

“Whatever,” Alix said. “Whatever it ends up being, I do sorta understand him. I do, really! He’s from an older era, where love was expected and encouraged. He was  _ encouraged  _ to fall in love with your mom-”   
  
“Big mistake there!” Chloe laughed bitterly.   
  
“-and encouraged to further his status,” Alix went on. “Increase his station.”

And here Chloe was looking at Alix with new eyes.   
  
“When the hell did you get so wise, shortie?” the blonde wondered.   
  
“I guess about the same time you decided to grow up a little!”   
  
And Chloe laughed. “Eh, fair!”

Maybe things would be a bit rough from here on in, that the road to change would be bumpy.

**_Do you need anybody?_ **

**_I need somebody to love_ **

**_Could it be anybody?_ **

**_I want somebody to love_ **

Society still had plenty of pressure placed upon her. She was still expected to be something she wasn’t. It wasn’t going to be easy.

**_Would you believe in a love at first sight?_ **

**_Yes, I'm certain that it happens all the time_ **

**_What do you see when you turn out the light?_ **

**_I can't tell you, but I know it's mine_ **

But nothing ever worth doing was, honestly. Chloe knew she was actually commanding respect for once. She wasn’t feared and hated by the rest of her class. They weren’t nodding with her because they were afraid she’d do something.

Maybe she hated herself, just a little. Maybe looking in the mirror every morning was difficult. She didn’t have her old court anymore. Sabrina had abandoned her for greener pastures. It hurt, yeah, but at least Chloe couldn’t treat her like a slave anymore. Hurt her anymore. It was for the better.

It was a trade off really. Lose one friend and some sycophants but gain something else in return. Namely, the ability to look some of her classmates in the eye. It was still going to be difficult, her father for example still didn’t know what to do with her. Paris was still working out what she was. But… she had something now.

**_Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends_ **

**_Mm, get high with a little help from my friends_ **

**_Oh, I'm gonna try with a little help from my friends_ **

Friends. Honest to god friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so yeah, [Alix and Chloe's final scene](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23934883/chapters/57977335) was inspired by that chapter. Credit where it's due.
> 
> Now, the song. Yeah, if you take it at face value it could be about love, but it also could be about friendship and that's all you need. It could be about Chloe saying when she turns out the light, she's happy with what she has. (And this isn't even getting into the arguments some have made about it being about being high as a kite, which yeaaaaaah I can see.)
> 
> Also, depression. I am really fed up with people portraying Depression as suicidalness and cutting. It's the Hollywood version, it's not accurate as it's a Spectrum. For everyone it's different. You feel... numb, like some things don't matter and you can't drag yourself out of bed or you don't care about caring for yourself. Like, you don't want to put on clean clothes or take care of pimples.
> 
> It's not always 'the world sucks and I want to jump off a bridge'.


	6. Day 6: Relationships

**_SunnySkiesAllDay:_ ** **_  
_ ** _ I’m so glad the fog has cleared from your mind, Bourgeois. You feel… authentic now, like genuine.  _

**_TheRealQueenBee, Bitch:_ ** **_  
_ ** _ Are you saying I didn’t feel real before? I’m Queen Bee, I’m as real as they come! What  _ **_other_ ** _ superheroine would lower herself to a simple group chat like this? Interact with those who she’s trying to protect? I don’t think even  _ **_Ladybug_ ** _ does that! _

_   
_ _   
_ **_SunnySkiesAllDay:_ **

_ Cat Noir does, oh you should have seen him in here the other day. The puns man, the puns! It was like a punderstorm of truly epic proportions! _

**_TheRealQueenBee, Bitch:_ **

_ Don’t you mean a thunderstorm, Beauréal? _

**_SunnySkiesAllDay:_ **

_ No, I did say a punderstorm. *shudder* See for yourself! _

_   
_ _   
_ Next came a picture, a screencap of yesterday’s chat and soon Chloe was mimicking SunnySkiesAllDay’s shudder. Like, ooooooh, that was bad. And Ladybug wanted to date  _ him?  _ Yuck! He was such a friggin’ dork! 

**_SunnySkiesAllDay:_ **

_ Appropriately scarred yet? _

_   
_ _   
_ **_TheRealQueenBee, Bitch:_ **

_ Don’t make me come over there and sting you! _

_   
_ _   
_ **_SunnySkiesAllDay:_ **

_ TrollFace.Gif _

**_SunnySkiesAllDay:_ **

_ Not very superheroic of you is it? _

_   
_ _   
_ **_GoneOnaTimeTrippingRide:_ **

_ Sitting back here and watching the show with popcorn. _

**_GoneOnaTimeTrippingRide:_ **

_ StarlightGlimmerWithPopcorn.Gif _

**_TheRealQueenBee, Bitch:_ **

_ >>> _ _   
  
_

**_TheRealQueenBee, Bitch:_ **

_ <<< _

**_TheRealQueenBee, Bitch:_ **

_...are usernames based on our previous akuma forms allowed? Because I’m tempted to go and re-name myself “TheFalseBug” now. Just because I hate myself that much. _

**_SunnySkiesAllDay:_ **

_ You’d be surprised, some of the other peeps in this chat do have enough of a sense of humor to go there. _

**_GoneOnaTimeTrippingRide:_ **

_ Eh, nowhere near as cool, Chloe. ‘Sides, you need to stop hanging onto your past and instead start moving forwards. _

**_TheRealQueenBee, Bitch:_ **

_ True! But again, when the hell did you get so wise Kubdel? _

_   
_ _   
_ **_GoneOnaTimeTrippingRide:_ **

_ *confused blinking* ...what do you mean? I’ve always been this wise! _

**_TheRealQueenBee, Bitch:_ **

_ ….sure, let’s go with that. That’s what you’re going with? *unconvinced eyebrow raise* _

**_GoneOnaTimeTrippingRide:_ **

_ Oh shaddup. _

**_SunnySkiesAllDay:_ **

_...what was even the chat topic again? _

**_GoneOnaTimeTrippingRide:_ **

_ TrollFace.Gif _ _   
  
_

**_GoneOnaTimeTrippingRide:_ **

_ Who cares? This is much more fun, sitting back and watching this show! _

Chloe gigg… laughed a little even as she exited out of the chat. She was  _ refined _ , she did not giggle like a schoolgirl!

Honestly though, she appreciated Aurore going out of her way like this. Making a group chat for the LGBTQ+ kids of Francois-Dupont. It was very relieving really, it meant she had people she could bitch with about society’s woes. About how it seemed to actively pursue heteronormativity. 

Nibbling a bit on her bagel, with coffee as bitter as her soul sitting by her side. Taking a long deliberate sip of it, the blonde kicked her feet up as she lay back on her deck chair. It was one of those perfectly warm spring days, where the sun shone down just right.

A ping pulled her out of her momentary peace.

**_SunnySkiesAllDay:_ **

_ Your dad still hasn’t come around has he? _

_   
_ _   
_ **_TheRealQueenBee, Bitch:_ **

_ Honestly? I haven’t talked to him. Not since… Not since that day. _

**_SunnySkiesAllDay:_ **

_ You can’t keep avoiding him forever. I’d honestly say you should at least open up to him. _

**_TheRealQueenBee, Bitch:_ **

_ Yeah, that’s what you, Alix  _ **_and_ ** _ Adrien have all said. I suppose they’re right, I can’t just keep up this silence with him forever. I need to know what he thinks, then go from there I guess? _

_   
_ _   
_ **_SunnySkiesAllDay:_ **

_ Sounds like a plan! *shoots a thumbs up* _

_   
_ _   
_ Chloe sucked in a breath before taking another shot of her coffee. Yeah, she needed her caffeinated strength for this.

**_TheRealQueenBee, Bitch:_ **

_ Bitch, please! I always got a plan for everything! I’m Queen Bee! Or haven’t you heard? _

Now if only she felt as confident as she said she was.

\-------

Of course, she wasn’t actually allowed to take that chance as once again fate intervened. Before she could swallow up more courage, it was time for patrol.

Honestly, on any other day Chloe would have loved the chance to get away from the oppressing atmosphere of the hotel. 

But not today.

However, in actuality she found herself getting involved in something just as important as rebuilding her personal life.   
  
“I DON’T BELIEVE HIM!” Ladybug snarled, sounding like she was barely able to string two words together. “He… he’s got some nerve!”   
  
At first Chloe would have guessed it was boyfriend troubles but then again Ladybug seemed to be  _ too  _ furious for that. Too righteously angry for it to be a simple breakup. 

It was something Queen Bee had seen before at times, not often but on several occasions. She sucked in a breath, remembering just what had been in the papers lately.

“Bastard…” she uttered.

“Agreed,” Cat Noir muttered. “Like… I don’t get it!”

There’d been this politician, Tristand Germain who’d been making headlines in the news lately. Well, making waves really. His statements, often controversial, had put the blame of akumas on the mentally divergent. The ‘unstable.’

Now,  _ obviously _ , this was bullshit but tell that to some of Paris. There had been an unsettling rise in attacks on the mentally divergent lately. Paris’ frustrations finally coming to a boil maybe? Perhaps. ...or maybe people had just been searching for an excuse.

The cynical part of Queen Bee suspected the latter was more true over the former. In any event, she had to wonder if Germain was being  _ paid  _ by Hawk Moth. He certainly couldn’t create a better atmosphere for akumas if he tried.   
  
...he was as miserable as she used to be. It sickened her to think that  _ maybe  _ if she hadn’t gotten that wake up call she could have gone in a similar direction. That one day she could be doing much the same.   
  
There had been akumas lately, scared and simply desperate people. Ones looking for an outlet. An  _ escape,  _ Queen Bee had realized with no small amount of horror.

“What’d he say this time?” she asked, still sipping that mug of coffee to calm herself. “...and more importantly, do I want to know?”   
  
“Just the same old same old,” Ladybug muttered bitterly. “He’s calling for  _ monitoring!  _ Monitoring, Bee. I’ve finally had enough, I have to do something about this.”

Yeah, there was that righteous fury in her eyes again. They were as calm as a storm at sea and you could hear the crack of thunder if you listened closely enough. 

“He’s spineless, that’s what he is,” Ladybug went on, apparently working herself up into a rant. “He refuses to admit he’s just a bigot so he hides behind walls, saying he’s ‘protecting Paris’. ...sometimes the true villains, if you ask me, don’t need to wear masks. The freakin’ coward, he refuses to expose himself as he really is. We have to fight. I refuse to let this stand.”   
  
_ “Woe betide anyone who crosses her,”  _ Queen Bee thought, knowing Ladybug was a much better person than her. She felt sickened with herself, realizing she’d never even think of crossing Germain. And here was her team leader, doing it without a second thought.  _ “I guess that’s why she’s got the Ladybug miraculous and I don’t. If I had been a little better, that could have been me. I wouldn’t have had to take some cheap knock off of her powers from  _ **_him._ ** _ But I’m just not that much of a hero. I honestly almost feel sorry for Germain.” _

Shakily, Ladybug spoke into her tool and with shortened breath Queen Bee realized what she was doing.

_ “Oh holy hell! She’s really going there?” _

“My name is Ladybug, and… and I have anxiety disorder,” the Heroine of Paris said in a shaky voice and Queen Bee knew after this was over she’d be huddled up in blankets. For a fearfully long moment, she looks away from the camera. Too afraid to say anything.

Queen Bee, for her part, honestly couldn’t say she blamed her. Here she was, exposing all of herself to the world, Opening herself up to critique and to scorn from a certain  _ man  _ and those who followed him. 

She had to help, and sent a warm smile in her idol’s direction. No, her  _ friend’s  _ direction. That seemed to give Ladybug the confidence she sorely needed.

Rubbing her temples, Ladybug continued to speak regaining her courage. “I… I’m doing this so you know I stand with you. If you’re watching this, you’ll know you aren’t alone. Mr. Germain, he has claimed you are a target for Hawk Moth. He, in his  _ bigotry  _ has-”   
  
The words were a snarl, just barely recognizable as speech in the heroine’s fury.

“I’m sorry, I need a moment…” Ladybug muttered, taking several short breaths to calm herself. “Okay, okay, I’m good. Mr. Germain.... What you said and what you’ve been saying is irresponsible, dangerous. You, with all of your power, you… oh, how do I put this?”   
  
She needed a moment to speak again.   
  
“I… I don’t want to sound rude, I’m trying desperately to stay civil. There’s a time and a place for fury,” Ladybug mutters. “Okay, as I was saying. Mr Germain, what you said is unequivocally false. I’ve had friends who were akumatized, and they are  _ way  _ more stable than I am.”

She clutched at her elbow. 

“As I said, I have an anxiety disorder. By Mr. Germain’s logic, I should have been akumatized hundreds of times. That I am… unworthy to wield my power. I… it hurts, people in power are supposed to protect us and yet… and yet… I don’t want this job at times, I’m scared. I won’t let that stop me though. Paris needs me,  _ clearly.  _ I will be there for you.”   
  
God, the sheer courage this must be taking… Again, Queen Bee was envious. She knew that could have been her speaking, addressing Paris. She was the Mayor’s daughter. She had to be speaking about this.

...so why was she such a damn coward?

Some superhero she was.

All the while, Lady Luck continued speaking. “I… have attacks, I’m not ashamed to admit that. It shouldn’t be something to be ashamed of. Despite what  _ some  _ people say. I’m… I’m sorry, that was mean.”   
  
She was so incredibly kind, even when she was rightfully calling out someone for their stupidity she couldn’t help but be so polite to them. 

“I… I catastrophize, I hyperfixate as it’s called. I’m always worrying about what could be. Unreasonable scenarios I guess? Things I know in my head are stupid afterwards but at the time feel so  _ likely _ . I’m doing it right now, worrying all of you will hate me and I’ll be forced to give up my powers.”

Ladybug laughed bitterly.

“...what a crock right? Some superheroine I am,” she echoed eerily. “I’m always told to get out of my own head but… but, well, easier said than done right? It’s given me a gift though, I guess you could call it my superpower? No matter what Hawk Moth could send after me, it’s… it’s nothing near as bad as what’s in my own head.”

Anyone watching her could tell she was afraid, terrified and about ready to curl up in a ball. Queen Bee wanted to rush to her, embrace her friend and tell her that it was okay. In a few minutes, she knew, Ladybug would be breaking down.

“I… I’m asking anyone, whoever sees this video. To share it, to tell your friends that they’re not alone,” Ladybug’s voice wavered, still stubbornly clenching her forearm. “I stand with you. Thank you for listening, Paris. Bug out.”

And as soon as she was done recording, she nearly collapses. She falls into Queen Bee’s arms, breathing shakily. She was quivering in terror, presumably going over too many scenarios in her own head.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay,” Queen Bee said comfortingly, calmly. A few weeks ago, this would haven’t been something she would have even  _ thought  _ of doing. “That right there… that was brave. Like, you really stood up for Paris. You know nobody believes that ass right?”   
  
“Enough people do…”   
  
“I mean nobody really important,” Queen Bee clarifies. “Like, his followers? They’re pathetic unimportant little nobodies.”

  
And Ladybug makes an odd noise, sounding a bit like an elephant. It was a gross, messy sound. It takes Queen Bee a moment to realize it’s a laugh.

\-------

**_SunnySkiesAllDay:_ **

_ You saw that right? That  _ **_massive_ ** _ callout LB did? _

_   
_ _   
_ **_TheRealQueenBee, Bitch:_ **

_ Bitch, please! I was there even! _

**_SunnySkiesAllDay:_ **

_ Girl’s got guts, like stand up and represent! Like… Seriously, Mr. Germain is a fuck! Where does he get off saying stuff like that? _

**_TheRealQueenBee, Bitch:_ **

_ It’s horrible, I know. Ridiculous, utterly ridiculous. That’s what that man is. He… I’m afraid, Aurore. Just between you and me. I’m afraid. I… yeah, you know what I have. _

**_SunnySkiesAllDay:_ **

_ I know girl… He’s treating you like you’re something that’s  _ **_wrong_ ** _ with the world. What’s wrong with him? What’s wrong with the people of Paris? I mean who voted for this bastard? _

_   
_ _   
_ **_TheRealQueenBee, Bitch:_ **

_ You know what politicians are like, Beauréal. All false smiles and fake promises right up until they unveil their true colors. Trust me, I know.  _ **_I know._ **

**_SunnySkiesAllDay:_ **

_ Man’s seriously a rainstorm, isn’t he? A rainstorm on a perfect summer’s day. It’s… just yeah. I’m afraid Chlo. I… I have a bipolar disorder, and that…  _ **_man_ ** _ is going up on the TV and saying something’s wrong with me. That I’m the cause of attacks. _

**_TheRealQueenBee, Bitch:_ **

_ Can I confess something? I feel like a coward. I saw LB calling him out, and… I should have joined in. I thought at the time maybe I didn’t want to steal her moment or something like that. But… But I was lying to myself, I was afraid. _

**_SunnySkiesAllDay:_ **

_ It takes nerve to go up and expose yourself like that Queenie. Nobody would blame you for not saying anything. _

_   
_ _   
_ **_TheRealQueenBee, Bitch:_ **

_ Well they should! I’m supposed to be a superhero, standing up for people. Instead, I… I just can’t. I chickened out at the last minute. Even when I try to be good, I’m horrid at it. I’m a horrible person. _

**_SunnySkiesAllDay:_ **

_ No you’re not Chloe. I’ve seen you, you’re trying so hard. You’ve come a long way. _

**_TheRealQueenBee, Bitch:_ **

_ Not far enough. _

Both were then surprised by something posted in the public chat.

**_GoneOnaTimeTrippingRide:_ **

_ Guys, you gotta see this! _

Below was a video link, and when opened…  _ Woah.  _ Like seriously, woah.

_ “I… my name is Cat Noir, and I have autism. A few of you already know, a few of you have already guessed by the flag I was bearing on Pride Day against Hetronormative Crusader. But this is me going on record, confirming it officially. So I guess the cat is… no, no puns today. Not for this. This isn’t the time for jokes.” _ _   
_ _   
_ Chloe fell back in her seat. No jokes? This  _ was  _ serious. She knew what he was doing, who he was speaking out against. Who this message was  _ exactly  _ directed towards.

A knot rose up in her throat. Even Cat was speaking out!

_ “I decided to do this video because… well, I think you all know.” _ _   
_ _   
_ He was playing with his fingers all throughout the video, stimming. He looked antsy even, like it was hard to sit in one spot. This was completely natural behavior for Cat, Chloe remembered.

_ “Mr, Germain… what you said earlier this week, what you’ve been saying all month is irresponsible, uninformed and above all  _ **_wrong_ ** _. Sure there have been a rise in akuma attacks, but not because of who the people are. It’s because of you. They’re scared Mr. Germain. Scared of you.” _ _   
_ _   
_ Chloe sucked in a breath, he was really going all in wasn’t he?   
  
_ “Me and LB, we’ve both said this time and again. Akuma victims are just that, victims. They’ve never been responsible for their own actions. The blame lies solely on Hawk Moth. No one else.” _ _   
_ _   
_ Something filled Chloe about then, she wasn’t sure what it was. Courage?

_ “However, lately… Lately, they have been drawn to Hawk Moth. They want an out, all because we pass the blame. To them. Is it any wonder some of them are afraid? Is it any wonder some of them were akumatized due to sheer stress? And honestly? I’m terrified. Because you’ve said we should be monitored, us. The mentally divergent. All for something completely beyond our control? Is that it?” _ _   
_ _   
_ The message was clear.

_ “Good night Paris.” _

**_GoneOnaTimeTrippingRide:_ **

_ Daaaaaaaaaaamnnnnnn. _

And what more could be said?

\-------

Chloe knew she had to say  _ something _ , that if she didn’t she’d simply drown under the pressure. So, despite her nerves telling her to run away she steeled herself. This could not fly. Tristand Germain had to be corrected.   
  
The people of Paris had to know  _ all  _ of their heroes stood with them. The marginalized, the downtrodden. The oppressed. 

She’d set up a video camera, pressed the ‘record’ button and started to speak.

“My name is Chloe Bourgeois, you may know me as Queen Bee. But what you may not know…” she steadied herself, no way to back out now. “I have been diagnosed with depression. Yeah, that’s right. Me, depressed!”

She laughed, bitterly.

“I mean, can you imagine? I’m the most upbeat person alive,” Chloe fake smiled, before frowning. “That’s all a mask. I have my good days and bad days. I… sometimes my days are horrible. Like, some days I just want to lie in bed, do nothing. It happens, not often, but it happens.”

She sucked in a breath, her hands trembling.

“Of course, normally I wouldn’t have said a word. Wouldn’t want to have gone and burdened people with my problems. They’re mine and mine alone to deal with.”   
  
Her tears had long since dried, there was no time for crying anymore.

“I am… I’m saying this to help you, to let you know that I  _ stand  _ with you. You are my hive Paris,” she knew she was barely looking at the camera, almost refusing to make eye contact. Her appearance was utterly horrid. She had a  _ pimple!  _ Her make up wasn’t on today. Maybe that was a good thing, it allowed Paris to see her as she really was.

“You are  _ my  _ hive,” Chloe, not Queen Bee, reaffirmed. She let her mask drop just this once, let down her walls. “Now now, first off, none of you need to worry. Especially you, Mr. Germain. Why my daddy hasn’t fired you is beyond me, oh well I suppose I shouldn't be surprised. It’s not like he’s been there for me when it really counts. Not lately. I’m not going to start popping pills, I’m not a risk. I just wanted you all to know that.”

She was tired, she knew that. She hadn’t slept well in a while, and after this maybe a nice long nap was in order. 

“It’s… hard to speak about this, maybe I should be seeing a therapist,” Queen Bee admitted, her voice soft and vulnerable. “But  _ not right now.  _ Not while Paris is still under threat. LB said something a while back, it stuck with me. Not all villains wear masks. Yes, you all know who I’m talking about.”   
  
She turned the camera to show her little dartboard of hate for Tristand. One dart had stuck him dead in his big floppy nose. His perfectly punchable nose. His perfectly breakable nose.

“Yeah, him,” Queen Bee said pointing to the dartboard. “He’s made it difficult for us as Parisans. How he got elected, I dunno? He’s certainly not an attractive sort is he? Now I’m not going to mince words. LB was perfectly polite. I am not Ladybug. I am not her. To put it simply, Mr. Germain? YOU SUCK!” 

She tossed another dart into the picture, nailing a perfect headshot.

“Like, I’m not sure how else I can make it perfectly clear. LB’s said her piece, Cat’s said his. Now I’mma gonna say mine. You are a bâtard. Like, seriously you can go to hell. ...though, then again, if I were to make a reference to Old Scratch and Élysée Palace I’d honestly favor the devil over you. Little Winston Churchill nod for you, yes I read. I’m not a dumb blonde. ...oh merde, I’ve gone off track haven’t I?”

She adjusted the camera slightly.

“I was scared to speak up about this before, I should have and I’m probably what Cat calls a ‘poser’,” Queen Bee admitted before laughing bitterly again. “I’m ridiculous, utterly ridiculous right?”

Maybe it was running a little on the long side, maybe she should stop before she exposed the rest of her issues. Quick, she had to finish this up.

“So, basically… yeah, your opinion is wrong Mr. Germain and I’d like you to keep it to yourself. Honestly, I’d like you out of office, but sadly I don’t think we always get what we want. Still, educate yourself.”

Okay, she had to close this out somehow? Maybe a little snide? She had a reputation to keep up after all.

“I’m Queen Bee and I approve of this message,” she said. “Peace!”

\-------

**_SunnySkiesAllDay:_ **

_ Daaaaaaaang girl, you really stepped up. You’re a real treat, like a warm ray of sunshine. _

Maybe her soul felt a bit lighter now, she thought with a smile even as she closed out the private message. The internet, apparently, had been ‘blowing up’ with her confession. Good, it was nice to make waves.

“My darling daughter…” her father tried to say, but Chloe was having none of it.   
  
“Just… just stop okay?” she sighed. “I know you don’t really care for me. Not when it counts. It’s taken me speaking up, addressing one of  _ your own politicians  _ before you decided to speak to me again.”   
  
“It’s just…” her dad said. “Well, me and the rest of the government have been talking. I’ve been talking to the Prime Minister. We’re thinking about letting Mr. Germain go. I can’t promise you anything, but… we’re working on it.”   
  
“Thanks…” Chloe said, somewhat surprised but rather grateful. “...I guess you can be useful.”   
  
It hurt, she knew, to speak to her dad like that but she still needed some time. And this just made things even more complicated, trying to work out what she thought of him now that he’d pulled this.

“Chloe?” a small, nervous but familiar voice spoke up from behind her. “I saw you on the internet. You were actually pretty awesome.”

_ Oh no.  _ She wasn’t ready to deal with  _ this.  _

“...Sabrina?” Chloe asked wearily, somewhat stunned. “...is that you?”   
  
“Yeah, it’s me,” Sabrina said walking up beside her. “...you’re really trying to change aren’t you? I… I’ve been doing some thinking okay?”   
  
“If you’re here to say we can’t be friends anymore, go right ahead,” Chloe braced herself. “I cna take it.”

“That’s just it,” Sabrina replied. “I  _ want  _ to be friends with you. The new you. You’re not  _ that  _ girl anymore. You’re… I’m actually pretty amazed.”   
  
“As if I can be anything else!” Chloe said in a haughty manner, regaining some of that old cockiness. “It’s me remember? When I set my mind to it, I can do  _ anything.  _ Even become a better person!”   
  
“Yeah…” Sabrina nodded.   
  
“I was inspired by you ‘Brina,” Chloe admitted, letting her walls down for the… oh god, how many times had she done that this week? “You were absolutely right, I was a horrid person and I couldn’t be friends with you. You were too good for me.”   
  
“Yeah, I was,” Sabrina confirmed surprising Chloe. She raised an eyebrow, impressed. My, her old friend really  _ had  _ changed! “You were a terrible person, I didn’t want to be friends with you. Not anymore. Letting me go was probably the best thing you could do to me. It gave me time to figure myself out.”   
  
“And so you came crawling back?” Chloe asked. “Even after how terrible I was? I didn’t have friends, I had sycophants. Including you, ‘Brina. I was toxic! I was a bad friend.”   
  
“Key word,  _ was _ . You’ve changed Chlo. I’ve seen it,” Sabrina replied. “I want to see how much. If… If you'll have me. I know you have new friends now, better ones. I just don’t see why you’d need me anymore…”   
  
“Of course I need you,” Chloe nodded, her eyes a bit watery. “Where would I be without my best friend?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah normally [I hate doing works inspired by other people.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/19837114/chapters/46973062) I like to come up with original ideas where I can, but I think in the case going all the way with the idea Galahad had is a good idea. Display all of Chloe's character development.
> 
> Honestly, I'm actually sad Galahad's piece never got continued, like it never got beyond four to five chapters and we never heard what anyone aside from Ladybug had to say. Rena was going to say something, but the story stopped before we could hear what it was.
> 
> I can only guess what Cat and Carapace and Queen Bee were going to say.
> 
> I think Carapace had PTSD in the fic? I may be remembering wrong.


	7. Day 7: Free Day

“Good patrol, Queenie!” Rena Rouge called out as she leaped off into the skyline. “Guess you’re not so bad after all!”

“Sorry, but I have to cut this short,” Queen Bee called back. “I’ve got places to be, people to schmooze with. You know how it is! Paris never waits for its Queen!”

Even as Chloe zipped into an empty subway tunnel to detransform she had to admit this wasn’t so bad after all. She had  _ respect  _ now. With her head held high, she marched out into the streets and joined the crowd.

There came a ping, just a reminder for her to see her therapist in about an hour. She’d been seeing him for about a week or two now. Was it helping? Maybe. She wasn’t sure yet.

It was a colder day, not particularly dry. Rain fell down in a gentle torrent, the sky a sea of grey above her stretching for as far as the eye could see. Like a blanket, it encompassed Paris.

The streets and the cobblestone were slick with water, gentle patting falling on her umbrella. It was a miserable day as things went and the moment she could cuddle up under some blankets next to a crackling fire? Well, then all would be well.

Inside her purse, Pollen was nibbling on honey-laced cookies and probably  _ much  _ drier than she. Another shiver. Ugh, bees hated the cold. 

Thankfully, she was just a short walk away from her father’s hotel and the bellboy couldn’t  _ wait  _ to take her wet coat. It was from a particularly high class brand, sheepskin. Obviously not from her mother’s line. She wouldn’t touch anything her mother designed for as long as she lived. This was yet another act of defiance in a particularly long list.

“Oh, get inside, it’s freezing out there,” Sabrina babbled helping her friend inside as she crossed the threshold. “You really shouldn’t have been out there!”   
  
“I had patrol, ‘Brina,” Chloe reminded her. “What was I supposed to do, call it off?”

Sabrina adjusted her glasses. “Maybe you could ask your Kwami about changing your costume, something a bit less… skin tight? Like maybe you could ask for a warmer costume?”   
  
“Me, change my superhero suit? No way! It’s meant to allow me some freedom to move!” Chloe scoffed before gesturing to herself. “‘Sides, I’m contractually obligated to tease the boys of Paris about what they want, but can never have! I mean, who doesn’t want all this?”   
  
Sabrina raised an eyebrow, noticing Chloe shivering.

“...but, I suppose I can ask Pollen if I can alter my costume, just a bit,” the blonde then grumbled in admittance. “...it is pretty cold isn’t it? Like, my suit was starting to stick to me at the end there.”

“Skin tight,” Sabrina remarked. “It’s implied in the name.”

Thunder grumbled from outside, a low rumble from the heavens. The rain seemed to have picked up, no longer just a drizzle indicating Chloe had managed to get inside just in time.

“Ugggghhhh, damn Hawk Moth for making us even do this,” Chloe muttered. “...if he wasn’t terrorizing this city, I’d be curled up under a blanket probably watching crappy movies. Hell, I may still do that after my therapist appointment.”   
  
“I’m proud of you for doing that, by the way,” Sabrina appraised. “You deciding to go ahead and admit that you needed help. It couldn’t have been easy.”   
  
“Yes, well…” Chloe pressed her fingers together nervously. “When you go live and say to the city of Paris in the middle of an impassioned plea that you need help… well, you go and get help.”   
  
She smirked viciously, a certain politician hadn’t been seen on the news in quite awhile now actually. Either he had been fired, or he hadn’t and was just hiding his head in shame. Not that Chloe would actually blame him.

All of Paris seemed to hate him now. Good. Words won wars, right? And when the heroes of Paris spoke, people listened. It was utterly disgusting that it took the big three actually saying something for anything to be done. The people should have pulled their own heads out of their own asses, they didn’t need her doing it for them.

Utterly ridiculous, and utterly disgraceful. She was supposed to be saving them from akumas, not their own stupidity.

“I’m… glad you pushed me into getting help,” Chloe admitted. “W-Without you, I… I probably would have chickened out. ...honestly, you’d have probably made a better hero than me. I think you needed a Miraculous over me back then.”   
  
“Chloe, what have we talked about?” Sabrina said sternly, eyes narrowed even as she placed a firm hand on her friend’s shoulder. She gripped it tightly, making the blonde wince in pain. “No putting yourself down.”   
  
“I was being serious. If… if you had someone to tell you our relationship was unhealthy,” Chloe stammered. “You might have broken away from me sooner, got better friends. I mean, I would have probably gotten more horrid, but you at least would have been happy so it all evens out right?”   
  
She laughed bitterly.

“And I was being serious too,” Sabrina said gently. “You’re better than you think you are, you just needed someone to help you figure that out.”   
  
“I could have done it without a Miraculous,” Chloe mused. “...probably. So don’t reassure me with words you know that are false. I’m not a  _ great _ person, ‘Brina. I may try to be, but in the end I’ll always be making amends for who I was. I can’t escape my past.”   
  
“I wasn’t asking you to run from it,” Sabrina hugged her. “All I’m asking is you stop putting yourself down. You’re one of Paris’ idols now, someone who’s constantly speaking up for social change and supporting the downtrodden. Ladybug couldn’t have made a better choice for the Bee. She knows it, and more importantly,  _ I  _ know it.”   
  
“Someone whose opinions are more important than Ladybug’s?” Chloe joked, and her friend giggled. “Impossible!”

All was mostly well in her life, she was seeing a therapist to work through her many - _ many _ \- issues and she had her best friend back. And she was starting to patch up her relationship with her father, so even better.

“Thanks daddy,” she hugged him tight. “Thanks for booking me an appointment, Sabrina may have encouraged me into getting help but you’re the one who finalized everything.”

“Anything for you dear,” her daddy said. “Anything.”   
  
“I hate that phrase,” Chloe confessed. “...it’s what got me to this situation in the first place, why I’m so… so messed up. You were trying, yeah, but giving me everything I wanted… it was never a substitute for actual parental love. You don’t have to lie to me, I was a spoiled brat.”   
  
Some days, Chloe would admit, she could barely look at herself in the mirror without thinking who she’d been. It was horribly childish, yeah sure, but that face staring back at her? Sometimes it was the one who she hated seeing.

In time, maybe that would be another issue she’d work through with the help of Dr. Arnaud. But not today. Just… just not yet. One step at a time.

“I just wanted to make sure you knew someone cared for you,” her daddy replied. “Your mother… well, you know what she’s like. Perhaps better than anyone.”   
  
“So you wanted to replace a lack of parental affection with smothering me?” Chloe asked. “Giving me anything and everything I ever wanted? Damn the consequences?”

“I wanted to give you the world,” her daddy replied. “You deserved it, in my eyes.”   
  
“Well, maybe ‘the world’ wasn’t what I needed,” Chloe returned, perhaps more waspishly than strictly necessary. She immediately looked a bit guilty. “...I just wanted someone to be there for me, a… a proper parent. I didn’t want ‘things’, I just wanted a dad.”   
  
God, she was so screwed up. She’d long since accepted that. Maybe she should become a child therapist as well, do a bit of family counseling. If she went down that path, maybe… maybe she could stop someone else from turning out like her.

It was the least she could do, right? Be a hero, both with a mask and without. There were probably plenty of more kids with screwed up families in Paris. ...god, the number of child akumas were rising. Kids screaming out in desperation, sending out cries for help.

Ladybug could cleanse the akumas, and maybe give a bit of life advice but she could only do so much. It was honestly scary to think about, and Chloe hated it. She wanted to do something. 

She didn’t want anyone to ever be like her. Her upbringing had shaped her into what she was, warts and all. But that didn’t mean anyone deserved to follow her path, that anyone deserved to be  _ exactly  _ like her.

Even worse, Chloe had seen the look in Cat Noir’s eyes, at times. Something lost, something broken. It pained her to think about it, but if anyone on the team was at greater risk than being akumatized than him they hid it well.

“I’m… sorry,” her father finally said after an awkwardly long since. “I’m… I was never given a manual, I've only been guessing my way through half of this. For what it’s worth, and I know you’ve already heard this from me way too many times to count, I’m sorry.”   
  
He seemed genuinely repentant, apologetic for his part in screwing up her life. 

“Apology accepted daddy,” Chloe smiled, rather warmly. “We both have a lot of things to learn.”   
  
“Me more than you,” her father sighed. “I should have tried to understand your life choices. I wasn’t very accepting. A father should love every part of his daughter, understand what she wants. ...or, well, doesn’t want in this case. I should have been better.”   
  
“We both should have been,” Chloe admitted. “I should have been a better daughter. Instead… instead what you got was a mini-me of mom. God, I hate thinking of myself that was but it’s true right?”   
  
“Well…” her father started.

“Don’t lie to me. I was becoming like mom,” Chloe shook a little. “...and tha? Well, that was the worst part of all. I hate mom, but I was so blind as to what I was becoming.”   
  
She looked out the window, the clouds beginning to part and the sun beginning to shine again. 

“I’ve had dreams, well… nightmares really,” she went on. “Of me becoming so entitled that Ladybut takes my Miraculous away. That I’d do anything to get it back, including working with Hawk Moth. I… I don’t want to be that girl.”

Yeah, another issue for her and her doctor to work out. She had to have been a psychologist’s wet dream. The perfect patient to run all sorts of experiments on. 

“I don’t think you will be, dear,” her daddy tried to reassure. “I’ve been watching you. You and Ladybug. I’ve seen her on the news, speaking almost as highly of you as she does Cat Noir. I don’t think your nightmares will be anything beyond just that. Nightmares.”   
  
“I guess we’ll see right?” Chloe ruminated. “Together?”   
  
“Yes, darling,” her father kissed her on the forehead. “Together.”

She knew she was a  _ long  _ way off from being great. There was probably still at least a year or so of therapy ahead of her before she could really properly look herself in the eye. 

But, at the same time she did feel a bit better about herself. She felt… free, now. She wasn’t lying to herself anymore. Her friends were at her back for once in her life, they weren’t honestly afraid of her. 

Chloe Bourgeois was a  _ hero  _ to Paris. An honest to god hero! An Aromantic icon. She had kids looking up to her! Her idol considered her a friend. She honestly had everything she could ever want.    
  
So maybe… in time, she could be truly great. There was really only one way to find out right?

  
  
_ Fin _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, it's been a ride but it's over now.
> 
> Honestly, yeah, I feel better about myself for doing this. I'm still not sure if I gave an entirely satisfactory ending or not, but yeah I feel better for doing this. Like, this is me saying that I can stand up and represent my peeps. 
> 
> So... until next time, Bug Out!

**Author's Note:**

> Chloe time! (Feel free to make a yay, sarcastic or otherwise)
> 
> Bet none of you were expecting this, eh? But you're getting it. I'm on the Aro spectrum myself, and I like to represent. And seriously, as mentioned in the AN for the first chapter Chloe sets off so many Aro vibes it's not even funny. 
> 
> Also, you a fan of Ladybug, and are you searching for a place to share your love for the series? Join us here at the [Miraculous Fanworks Discord! ](https://discord.gg/mlfanworks)


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